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How to Detox Your Finances.

One thing you need to do when you resolve to get your financial ducks in a row is to know how to detox your finances. It is important to get rid of old habits, any residual money pits, or anything else that is hurting you financially so that you can move on in a financially sound manner. These steps provide a financial detox plan to get you on your way.

Steps.

1. Sort out your credit and debts immediately.

Check your credit report. Do this, at the very least, annually. You are entitled to a free credit report once a year from each of the three major agencies.

Manage your credit. Don't let it manage you. Don't max out your cards just because you have a certain limit. It's more important to stay conscious of what you can afford to pay rather than relying on any illusory limit as a source of your finances. The banks want you to spend that much; it doesn't mean you have the income flow capacity to meet it regularly!

Manage your debt. If you are struggling, talk to your creditors. Don't ignore the problem, it will not go away on its own, it will only get worse. The sooner that you seek financial advice and support, the faster you can turn around debt problems.

Avoid store credit cards. Their APR (annual percentage rate) is considerably higher than a 'regular' credit card and having several cards can tempt you into thinking you have more spare cash than you actually do. Store cards also tie you down to spending at one place, regardless of whether it has the best deals or not.

2. Sort out your savings and insurance.

Get a decent interest level in your savings account. Work out how much you can spare from your income to place into this account and try to stick with that minimum on a regular basis. Keep checking for better savings deals and switch your money around to follow increased interest returns - internet banking makes it easier to track interest changes and change your savings approach regularly.

Realize that saving in a low interest savings account might not actually be the best use of your money. If you can use 100 dollars towards knocking down a high rate card or a very low rate savings account, think hard about where to use it.

Invest in yourself. Get some life insurance. Educate yourself about the different types of insurance and what suits you at the time. If you can't afford to make such a payment now, what makes you think your family will be able to if something happens to you? It's a priority worth sorting out in the present.

3. Become actively involved in your finances.

Think about where the money is going, what it is doing. Don't just 'let it happen', or hope that money will come to you. Active planning, saving, and debt paying requires the investment of your time and engaged interest.

Undertake weekly money management tasks. It is better to spend 20 minutes a week sorting finances than to leave it all to tax time - incremental financial attention each week will save you a lot of effort and time in the long run.

4. Watch out for fraud. There are some key things that you can do to protect yourself:

Destroy any unneeded receipts and statements;

Retain the receipts you do need (in a safe place) and compare them against credit card and other financial statements;

Never disclose your personal information to someone on the phone, such as a cold sales call or through your email. It is crucial to remember that most of the time, your email is not secure.

Redirect your mail immediately when you move. If someone moves into a house behind you, they are unlikely to have the same stake that you will in safeguarding your information and will simply throw things in the trash where they can be found by others, or worse still, might be tempted to make fraudulent use of it.

Check your credit report periodically.

Remember that if a deal seems too good to be true, it probably is. Do your research and ask trusted people for advice before leaping in and spending your money.

5. Track your expenditures.

Do this to identify where your money is going and whether or not each expenditure is necessary or frivolous. This will allow you to build a bigger spending pattern and review what you are spending your money on. You can do this by:

Saving receipts (for at least as long as it will take you to note down the cost and what was covered).

Keeping a notebook handy that you can write down prices and purchases as they occur.

6. Think before you buy.

Save, then buy. Start reminding yourself often that don't have to have that item or service right now. That new computer will wait until you can save up to get a new one. Putting a $500 computer on credit now can easily cost you over a thousand dollars over the period it takes to pay it off. Write "New Computer" on an envelope and put money into it every chance you get. Hide the envelope and don't ever take money out except for the new computer.

Avoid impulse buying. Nothing is that important. Stores prey on consumers trying to get you to buy. That is why they are laid out the way they are and why the candy and magazines are right by the cash register.

Carry it around the store for a while. Quite often, you will realize that maybe you don't need it just now. Research it on the Internet to see if you can find it more cheaply, or to see if it really does do what you want it to. Maybe you can borrow someone else's rather than owning it? Think through all the options.

Don't buy into a brand just because you always have. With today's technology, there are alternatives to just about anything, and quite often they are less expensive. Look around and be a choosy buyer. Use buyer comparison sites before you go shopping so that you are aware of the best deals and can use this knowledge to bargain with.

Learn how to haggle and don't be uncomfortable about it. Bargaining is a good way of getting a fair deal.

7. Take charge of your home space.

Sell things that you aren't using or don't want. They are just taking up space and not giving you joy. If you can't sell it, consider donating it. Your personal environment will be a lot cleaner for it and other people can benefit from your donation.

Declutter your home and your life. Clean out your garage, have a yard sale, etc. Doing this will surprisingly lighten your load. It is also a good way of reminding yourself that it's easier not to bring things into the house in the first place as you'll only end up having to clean them out!

Look at your energy usage. Change to light bulbs that use less energy, water heating that is less energy-intensive and turn off your appliances when not in use. Simple things that can save you a lot of money in the long run.

8. Take charge of your earnings.

Earn what you deserve. Look at your wages. Find out what the going rate is for what you are doing in your area. See what you can do to get your salary increased.

Increase your brand value. Yes, your brand value. See what you can do to increase your value to yourself and to your employers.

9. Balance your life and your work. Balance is very important to help you deal with day to day problems. When you are off balance with one thing, other problems will quickly follow and it can be all too easy to resort to spending as the answer to not coping with juggling many things in your life. Slow down and do a stocktake on what you need to change about the way you're living.

10. Teach your children about finances. Don't just assume that because they are kids, they shouldn't have to think about how to budget and how to delay desires for instant gratification. The bad habits they start now will stay with them; equally, teaching them good habits will be life-lasting too.

Tips.

If you have a lot of debt from credit cards, personal loans, payday or car title loans or medical bills, you may want to consult an attorney about bankruptcy.

Visit a free credit counselor in your area for financial and budgetary advice and counseling. These can be especially helpful if you feel you are in over your head.

Avoid blurring wants and needs. It is important to focus on the things you need first and be very conscious about fulfilling your wants.

AnnualCreditReport.com provides consumers with the secure means to request and obtain a free credit report once every 12 months from each of the three nationwide consumer credit reporting companies in accordance with the Fair and Accurate Credit Transactions Act (FACT Act). AnnualCreditReport.com offers consumers a fast and convenient way to request, view and print their credit reports in a secure Internet environment. They also provide options to request reports by telephone and by mail.

Warnings.

Stay away from companies that offer to repair your credit report or score. Many times these agencies will contest all the debts shown on your report. This process works temporarily, as creditors are required to verify debt within 30 days or it is removed from your report. At this point you will appear to have a "clean" record and the agency may collect a hefty fee from you. When the creditors do get around to verifying your debt, it will simply be added to your report again.

None of the advertised credit offers have accurate reporting from the credit bureaus.

There are many companies out there who will offer "free" credit services like reports and score monitoring to first-time customers. Be advised that while you may receive an initial report for free, you may be required to sign up for some kind of paid membership after your trial period is over. These reports are not directly from the credit bureaus, and they are not always accurate.

Credit bureaus do not maintain reporting agencies. There is only one agency maintained, an which deals directly with the bureaus. This site deals with both the FTC and the credit bureaus.
January 20, 2020


How to Detox Your Finances.

One thing you need to do when you resolve to get your financial ducks in a row is to know how to detox your finances. It is important to get rid of old habits, any residual money pits, or anything else that is hurting you financially so that you can move on in a financially sound manner. These steps provide a financial detox plan to get you on your way.

Steps.

1. Sort out your credit and debts immediately.

Check your credit report. Do this, at the very least, annually. You are entitled to a free credit report once a year from each of the three major agencies.

Manage your credit. Don't let it manage you. Don't max out your cards just because you have a certain limit. It's more important to stay conscious of what you can afford to pay rather than relying on any illusory limit as a source of your finances. The banks want you to spend that much; it doesn't mean you have the income flow capacity to meet it regularly!

Manage your debt. If you are struggling, talk to your creditors. Don't ignore the problem, it will not go away on its own, it will only get worse. The sooner that you seek financial advice and support, the faster you can turn around debt problems.

Avoid store credit cards. Their APR (annual percentage rate) is considerably higher than a 'regular' credit card and having several cards can tempt you into thinking you have more spare cash than you actually do. Store cards also tie you down to spending at one place, regardless of whether it has the best deals or not.

2. Sort out your savings and insurance.

Get a decent interest level in your savings account. Work out how much you can spare from your income to place into this account and try to stick with that minimum on a regular basis. Keep checking for better savings deals and switch your money around to follow increased interest returns - internet banking makes it easier to track interest changes and change your savings approach regularly.

Realize that saving in a low interest savings account might not actually be the best use of your money. If you can use 100 dollars towards knocking down a high rate card or a very low rate savings account, think hard about where to use it.

Invest in yourself. Get some life insurance. Educate yourself about the different types of insurance and what suits you at the time. If you can't afford to make such a payment now, what makes you think your family will be able to if something happens to you? It's a priority worth sorting out in the present.

3. Become actively involved in your finances.

Think about where the money is going, what it is doing. Don't just 'let it happen', or hope that money will come to you. Active planning, saving, and debt paying requires the investment of your time and engaged interest.

Undertake weekly money management tasks. It is better to spend 20 minutes a week sorting finances than to leave it all to tax time - incremental financial attention each week will save you a lot of effort and time in the long run.

4. Watch out for fraud. There are some key things that you can do to protect yourself:

Destroy any unneeded receipts and statements;

Retain the receipts you do need (in a safe place) and compare them against credit card and other financial statements;

Never disclose your personal information to someone on the phone, such as a cold sales call or through your email. It is crucial to remember that most of the time, your email is not secure.

Redirect your mail immediately when you move. If someone moves into a house behind you, they are unlikely to have the same stake that you will in safeguarding your information and will simply throw things in the trash where they can be found by others, or worse still, might be tempted to make fraudulent use of it.

Check your credit report periodically.

Remember that if a deal seems too good to be true, it probably is. Do your research and ask trusted people for advice before leaping in and spending your money.

5. Track your expenditures.

Do this to identify where your money is going and whether or not each expenditure is necessary or frivolous. This will allow you to build a bigger spending pattern and review what you are spending your money on. You can do this by:

Saving receipts (for at least as long as it will take you to note down the cost and what was covered).

Keeping a notebook handy that you can write down prices and purchases as they occur.

6. Think before you buy.

Save, then buy. Start reminding yourself often that don't have to have that item or service right now. That new computer will wait until you can save up to get a new one. Putting a $500 computer on credit now can easily cost you over a thousand dollars over the period it takes to pay it off. Write "New Computer" on an envelope and put money into it every chance you get. Hide the envelope and don't ever take money out except for the new computer.

Avoid impulse buying. Nothing is that important. Stores prey on consumers trying to get you to buy. That is why they are laid out the way they are and why the candy and magazines are right by the cash register.

Carry it around the store for a while. Quite often, you will realize that maybe you don't need it just now. Research it on the Internet to see if you can find it more cheaply, or to see if it really does do what you want it to. Maybe you can borrow someone else's rather than owning it? Think through all the options.

Don't buy into a brand just because you always have. With today's technology, there are alternatives to just about anything, and quite often they are less expensive. Look around and be a choosy buyer. Use buyer comparison sites before you go shopping so that you are aware of the best deals and can use this knowledge to bargain with.

Learn how to haggle and don't be uncomfortable about it. Bargaining is a good way of getting a fair deal.

7. Take charge of your home space.

Sell things that you aren't using or don't want. They are just taking up space and not giving you joy. If you can't sell it, consider donating it. Your personal environment will be a lot cleaner for it and other people can benefit from your donation.

Declutter your home and your life. Clean out your garage, have a yard sale, etc. Doing this will surprisingly lighten your load. It is also a good way of reminding yourself that it's easier not to bring things into the house in the first place as you'll only end up having to clean them out!

Look at your energy usage. Change to light bulbs that use less energy, water heating that is less energy-intensive and turn off your appliances when not in use. Simple things that can save you a lot of money in the long run.

8. Take charge of your earnings.

Earn what you deserve. Look at your wages. Find out what the going rate is for what you are doing in your area. See what you can do to get your salary increased.

Increase your brand value. Yes, your brand value. See what you can do to increase your value to yourself and to your employers.

9. Balance your life and your work. Balance is very important to help you deal with day to day problems. When you are off balance with one thing, other problems will quickly follow and it can be all too easy to resort to spending as the answer to not coping with juggling many things in your life. Slow down and do a stocktake on what you need to change about the way you're living.

10. Teach your children about finances. Don't just assume that because they are kids, they shouldn't have to think about how to budget and how to delay desires for instant gratification. The bad habits they start now will stay with them; equally, teaching them good habits will be life-lasting too.

Tips.

If you have a lot of debt from credit cards, personal loans, payday or car title loans or medical bills, you may want to consult an attorney about bankruptcy.

Visit a free credit counselor in your area for financial and budgetary advice and counseling. These can be especially helpful if you feel you are in over your head.

Avoid blurring wants and needs. It is important to focus on the things you need first and be very conscious about fulfilling your wants.

AnnualCreditReport.com provides consumers with the secure means to request and obtain a free credit report once every 12 months from each of the three nationwide consumer credit reporting companies in accordance with the Fair and Accurate Credit Transactions Act (FACT Act). AnnualCreditReport.com offers consumers a fast and convenient way to request, view and print their credit reports in a secure Internet environment. They also provide options to request reports by telephone and by mail.

Warnings.

Stay away from companies that offer to repair your credit report or score. Many times these agencies will contest all the debts shown on your report. This process works temporarily, as creditors are required to verify debt within 30 days or it is removed from your report. At this point you will appear to have a "clean" record and the agency may collect a hefty fee from you. When the creditors do get around to verifying your debt, it will simply be added to your report again.

None of the advertised credit offers have accurate reporting from the credit bureaus.

There are many companies out there who will offer "free" credit services like reports and score monitoring to first-time customers. Be advised that while you may receive an initial report for free, you may be required to sign up for some kind of paid membership after your trial period is over. These reports are not directly from the credit bureaus, and they are not always accurate.

Credit bureaus do not maintain reporting agencies. There is only one agency maintained, an which deals directly with the bureaus. This site deals with both the FTC and the credit bureaus.
January 22, 2020


How to Take a Healthy Approach to Finances in Your Relationship.


If you've ever been in a relationship for very long, especially if you were married or living together, it is almost a guarantee that you've had a money fight. One of the biggest causes of problems in relationships is differences in values and goals and habits when it comes to money, and especially communication about money issues.

Money can't buy you love, but it sure can tear it apart.

The crux of this article is to learn how to talk about money, and learn to align your financial goals. If you can do those two things, you've done more than most couples, and you've done a lot to keep your relationship on solid ground.



Steps.

1. Sit down and talk about house, kids, college education for the kids, a healthy emergency fund, nice cars, travel each year, nice clothes, gadgets and computers, etc.

Then prioritize, and see if you can come up with things in common. If you want different things, it is important that you talk about why, and consider the other person's desires. If that's what makes the other person happy, you should want to make them happy - that's the basis of a good relationship. But relationships aren't one-sided, either, so you should be able to be happy too. The point is that both sides should be considered, and you should look for a win-win solution or compromise so that you can both be happy.

Discuss how you will handle assets and debts that were accumulated before the relationship began. If you are married in the U.S., your spouse's creditors can hold you legally responsible and pursue your assets if you don't keep your finances completely separated, or if you ever get divorced. Plus, your spouse's credit score will affect your ability to get joint credit, which is often necessary for large purchases (such as a home). So if you're married, the best route is to work together to pay off debt as quickly as possible, avoiding late payments. If you're planning on getting married soon, a pre-nuptial agreement can help protect one person's assets from the other person's creditors. If you're not married, you may choose to treat individual debt as a shared expense, or you may not - the choice is yours as a couple.

2. Remove emotions from financial talk. From your first meetings about financial goals to your subsequent weekly talks (addressed in a later step), it's important that the two of you stay calm, don't get hurt or angry over any of the issues, and try to look at these issues objectively. Often financial issues are tied up in all kinds of emotional issues, stemming from childhood, from issues of security to feeling like your way is better, to feeling hurt if your way of spending is criticized in any way, and much more. These emotional issues are all tangled together with financial issues, and it's important that you untangle them and just deal with financial goals and habits:

Don't use emotional, accusatory, or inflammatory language. Use nonviolent communication.

Don't blame the other person or even be negatively critical.

Simply talk about your financial goals, developing a plan for getting to those goals, developing a system for dealing with finances, and so forth.

Also, try not to feel like you're under attack if the other person talks about your goals or habits — let this be an open discussion, and if you feel under attack, stop and take a breath and remember that this isn't a discussion about you personally but about how the two of you are going to meet your goals. Again, think of this as a team effort, not as a you-vs-me effort.

3. Come up with a plan to meet your goals. Once you're able to come up with common financial goals (a huge step - celebrate!), you will need a plan to get you there. This will take into account your joint income, your debt, your savings, how much you can put towards debt and/or saving each month, whether you want to cut back on certain things in order to meet your savings goals, how long you want to give yourself to meet financial goals, and so forth:

Start by having a definite time frame for each goal, and then figure out how much you need to save (or pay towards debt) each month to get to your goals. Try to get into the habit of paying yourselves first.

Create a spending plan (if you haven't already) for each month, and see if you can adjust it to meet that monthly goal. You might need to cut back on some things, or earn extra income, or both. Or you might discover that your goals aren't realistic and you need to cut back on them, reprioritize, or push them back a bit in order to meet them. This plan to meet your goals is how you will align your daily and monthly spending with your long-term goals. It's also a great way to resolve minor short-term disputes - for example, "you should definitely buy fewer shoes, and I should buy fewer video games, so we can buy that house in three years and travel to Europe in two years". Spending plans will evolve as time goes by -- this is inevitable; be prepared to adjust and adapt to your changing situations (promotion at work, unexpected expenses like constant car repairs indicating an upcoming major expense, etc.) as needed.

4. Develop a system for finances that works for both of you. It may take some trial, error and tweaking before you get it right. Keep in mind that no one arrangement is in any way "better" than the other. The best arrangement is the one that creates the most harmony in your relationship.

Use the communal approach if you have very similar spending styles and saving goals. All of the income received by the couple goes into a single account, and all expenses come out of that single account. If you're not on the same page about spending, like if one person tends to make money decisions that the other person tends to disagree with, this approach can lead to frequent arguments. Communication, trust, and discipline are essential for this arrangement to work smoothly.

Use the individual approach if you have different spending styles. Keep separate accounts to which your individual incomes are deposited. Put money into a joint account only for shared expenses. Decide what those shared expenses are going to be (usually rent or mortgage, utilities, etc.) and what proportion each partner will pay. You can each put in half of the expenses, or you may decide to contribute a percentage that's relative to your individual income (e.g. one person makes twice as much per year as the other, so one person puts twice as much towards the shared expenses as the other). The remainder of the money in each person's account is theirs to keep and spend or save however they wish.

Use the allowance approach if it fits. This is a hybrid of the previous two arrangements. Put everything into a joint account, but then give each person an allowance to spend as they wish. The allowance can be in cash, or it can be transferred to individual accounts. Decide as a couple how much of an allowance each person should get. This works best for people who tend to spend money on different things, but who still want to pool their income.

5. Decide who will be handling the "administrative" aspects of your finances. In order to put your financial plan into action, you'll need to figure out how you're going to pay your bills, pay debt, deposit into savings, have money for various spending needs (like gas and groceries and eating out), and so forth. Someone will have to take responsibility for each part of the system (it's better if you're both involved, but you should find what works best for you as a couple). Usually there's one person who's more inclined to do the bookkeeping, and sometimes he or she doesn't mind carrying this responsibility. Otherwise, you'll need to define and assign responsibility. One person might go to the bank while the other updates your financial program (like Quicken or Money) or your checking register to make sure you're in balance, for example.

If one person will be handling the finances more than the other, what is his or her responsibility in consulting with the other before, say, moving money into the savings account or IRA?

If the person who normally handles these tasks can't do it (e.g. medical issue, away on a trip, etc.) does the other person know enough about the process to step in?

6. Have weekly financial meetings. This is very important, and it's a step that many couples overlook. Just because you have common financial goals and a plan and a system doesn't mean that everything is fine. If one person takes responsibility for the finances, for example, and the other is out of the loop, there will likely be problems down the road. You don't want to be in the situation where one partner took care of the finances and the other was blissfully ignorant...until it was revealed that they were way behind on payments and would soon have to file for bankruptcy. That isn't a good time in a relationship! To prevent problems like this, have a weekly meeting where you sit down and talk about finances. You can review your accounts, your spending plan, what is coming up in the next few weeks that you'll need to budget for, any problem areas, what to do with your annual bonus, where you are with your goals, and so forth. Make sure you're both caught up on everything, and that you're working well as a team.

7. Adapt as needed. You may need to adjust the allowances or proportions if a big expense arises, like one person loses a job, or suffers from a major illness or injury, or even takes up a new (and expensive) interest or hobby. For instance, let's say a couple uses the communal approach, and then one partner decides to take up golfing again. The couple may decide that the best way to accommodate this is to designate a "golfing allowance" so that one partner knows exactly how much the other partner is going to be spending on this hobby, and there are no surprises ("You spent how much on that golf club?!?"). (In the golfing example, additional expenses could be drawn from the person's personal allowance.) Many couples modify their arrangement significantly as their circumstances change. A couple may, for example, start off with the individual approach, then transition into the communal approach when they start a family or make a large investment together.

8. Above all, stay positive and be honest. Remember: you're a team. You have the same goals and you want each other to be happy. Team members can help each other out and encourage each other, or they can rip the team apart by being negative, by blaming, by working against common goals. If you always stay positive, you'll succeed as a team. Be encouraging, stay focused on solutions not blame, and make sure love is the foundation of everything you do.



Question : My fiance is always asking me to bail him out of his financial problems and I feel like it's too much for me. How can I approach him without hurting his feelings?

Answer : Tell it to him straight. Honesty is the best policy.



Tips.

No matter how you choose to handle your finances as a couple, you should talk about and dedicate money to an emergency fund of 3 to 6 months' worth of living expenses.

Just because you have individual accounts doesn't mean you don't trust one another. Sometimes it's not convenient to discuss every single purchase in real time, and this can occasionally lead to misunderstandings and even overdraft fees at the bank. It's possible to make individual accounts into joint accounts so that you can see each other's financial activities, but agree not to use money from the other person's designated account without discussing it first, or unless it's an emergency.

Even if you have a 'joint account', you should still have a separate account for yourself, 'cause it gives you independence from your partner.


February 25, 2020

How to Take a Healthy Approach to Finances in Your Relationship.


If you've ever been in a relationship for very long, especially if you were married or living together, it is almost a guarantee that you've had a money fight. One of the biggest causes of problems in relationships is differences in values and goals and habits when it comes to money, and especially communication about money issues.

Money can't buy you love, but it sure can tear it apart.

The crux of this article is to learn how to talk about money, and learn to align your financial goals. If you can do those two things, you've done more than most couples, and you've done a lot to keep your relationship on solid ground.



Steps.

1. Sit down and talk about house, kids, college education for the kids, a healthy emergency fund, nice cars, travel each year, nice clothes, gadgets and computers, etc.

Then prioritize, and see if you can come up with things in common. If you want different things, it is important that you talk about why, and consider the other person's desires. If that's what makes the other person happy, you should want to make them happy - that's the basis of a good relationship. But relationships aren't one-sided, either, so you should be able to be happy too. The point is that both sides should be considered, and you should look for a win-win solution or compromise so that you can both be happy.

Discuss how you will handle assets and debts that were accumulated before the relationship began. If you are married in the U.S., your spouse's creditors can hold you legally responsible and pursue your assets if you don't keep your finances completely separated, or if you ever get divorced. Plus, your spouse's credit score will affect your ability to get joint credit, which is often necessary for large purchases (such as a home). So if you're married, the best route is to work together to pay off debt as quickly as possible, avoiding late payments. If you're planning on getting married soon, a pre-nuptial agreement can help protect one person's assets from the other person's creditors. If you're not married, you may choose to treat individual debt as a shared expense, or you may not - the choice is yours as a couple.

2. Remove emotions from financial talk. From your first meetings about financial goals to your subsequent weekly talks (addressed in a later step), it's important that the two of you stay calm, don't get hurt or angry over any of the issues, and try to look at these issues objectively. Often financial issues are tied up in all kinds of emotional issues, stemming from childhood, from issues of security to feeling like your way is better, to feeling hurt if your way of spending is criticized in any way, and much more. These emotional issues are all tangled together with financial issues, and it's important that you untangle them and just deal with financial goals and habits:

Don't use emotional, accusatory, or inflammatory language. Use nonviolent communication.

Don't blame the other person or even be negatively critical.

Simply talk about your financial goals, developing a plan for getting to those goals, developing a system for dealing with finances, and so forth.

Also, try not to feel like you're under attack if the other person talks about your goals or habits — let this be an open discussion, and if you feel under attack, stop and take a breath and remember that this isn't a discussion about you personally but about how the two of you are going to meet your goals. Again, think of this as a team effort, not as a you-vs-me effort.

3. Come up with a plan to meet your goals. Once you're able to come up with common financial goals (a huge step - celebrate!), you will need a plan to get you there. This will take into account your joint income, your debt, your savings, how much you can put towards debt and/or saving each month, whether you want to cut back on certain things in order to meet your savings goals, how long you want to give yourself to meet financial goals, and so forth:

Start by having a definite time frame for each goal, and then figure out how much you need to save (or pay towards debt) each month to get to your goals. Try to get into the habit of paying yourselves first.

Create a spending plan (if you haven't already) for each month, and see if you can adjust it to meet that monthly goal. You might need to cut back on some things, or earn extra income, or both. Or you might discover that your goals aren't realistic and you need to cut back on them, reprioritize, or push them back a bit in order to meet them. This plan to meet your goals is how you will align your daily and monthly spending with your long-term goals. It's also a great way to resolve minor short-term disputes - for example, "you should definitely buy fewer shoes, and I should buy fewer video games, so we can buy that house in three years and travel to Europe in two years". Spending plans will evolve as time goes by -- this is inevitable; be prepared to adjust and adapt to your changing situations (promotion at work, unexpected expenses like constant car repairs indicating an upcoming major expense, etc.) as needed.

4. Develop a system for finances that works for both of you. It may take some trial, error and tweaking before you get it right. Keep in mind that no one arrangement is in any way "better" than the other. The best arrangement is the one that creates the most harmony in your relationship.

Use the communal approach if you have very similar spending styles and saving goals. All of the income received by the couple goes into a single account, and all expenses come out of that single account. If you're not on the same page about spending, like if one person tends to make money decisions that the other person tends to disagree with, this approach can lead to frequent arguments. Communication, trust, and discipline are essential for this arrangement to work smoothly.

Use the individual approach if you have different spending styles. Keep separate accounts to which your individual incomes are deposited. Put money into a joint account only for shared expenses. Decide what those shared expenses are going to be (usually rent or mortgage, utilities, etc.) and what proportion each partner will pay. You can each put in half of the expenses, or you may decide to contribute a percentage that's relative to your individual income (e.g. one person makes twice as much per year as the other, so one person puts twice as much towards the shared expenses as the other). The remainder of the money in each person's account is theirs to keep and spend or save however they wish.

Use the allowance approach if it fits. This is a hybrid of the previous two arrangements. Put everything into a joint account, but then give each person an allowance to spend as they wish. The allowance can be in cash, or it can be transferred to individual accounts. Decide as a couple how much of an allowance each person should get. This works best for people who tend to spend money on different things, but who still want to pool their income.

5. Decide who will be handling the "administrative" aspects of your finances. In order to put your financial plan into action, you'll need to figure out how you're going to pay your bills, pay debt, deposit into savings, have money for various spending needs (like gas and groceries and eating out), and so forth. Someone will have to take responsibility for each part of the system (it's better if you're both involved, but you should find what works best for you as a couple). Usually there's one person who's more inclined to do the bookkeeping, and sometimes he or she doesn't mind carrying this responsibility. Otherwise, you'll need to define and assign responsibility. One person might go to the bank while the other updates your financial program (like Quicken or Money) or your checking register to make sure you're in balance, for example.

If one person will be handling the finances more than the other, what is his or her responsibility in consulting with the other before, say, moving money into the savings account or IRA?

If the person who normally handles these tasks can't do it (e.g. medical issue, away on a trip, etc.) does the other person know enough about the process to step in?

6. Have weekly financial meetings. This is very important, and it's a step that many couples overlook. Just because you have common financial goals and a plan and a system doesn't mean that everything is fine. If one person takes responsibility for the finances, for example, and the other is out of the loop, there will likely be problems down the road. You don't want to be in the situation where one partner took care of the finances and the other was blissfully ignorant...until it was revealed that they were way behind on payments and would soon have to file for bankruptcy. That isn't a good time in a relationship! To prevent problems like this, have a weekly meeting where you sit down and talk about finances. You can review your accounts, your spending plan, what is coming up in the next few weeks that you'll need to budget for, any problem areas, what to do with your annual bonus, where you are with your goals, and so forth. Make sure you're both caught up on everything, and that you're working well as a team.

7. Adapt as needed. You may need to adjust the allowances or proportions if a big expense arises, like one person loses a job, or suffers from a major illness or injury, or even takes up a new (and expensive) interest or hobby. For instance, let's say a couple uses the communal approach, and then one partner decides to take up golfing again. The couple may decide that the best way to accommodate this is to designate a "golfing allowance" so that one partner knows exactly how much the other partner is going to be spending on this hobby, and there are no surprises ("You spent how much on that golf club?!?"). (In the golfing example, additional expenses could be drawn from the person's personal allowance.) Many couples modify their arrangement significantly as their circumstances change. A couple may, for example, start off with the individual approach, then transition into the communal approach when they start a family or make a large investment together.

8. Above all, stay positive and be honest. Remember: you're a team. You have the same goals and you want each other to be happy. Team members can help each other out and encourage each other, or they can rip the team apart by being negative, by blaming, by working against common goals. If you always stay positive, you'll succeed as a team. Be encouraging, stay focused on solutions not blame, and make sure love is the foundation of everything you do.



Question : My fiance is always asking me to bail him out of his financial problems and I feel like it's too much for me. How can I approach him without hurting his feelings?

Answer : Tell it to him straight. Honesty is the best policy.



Tips.

No matter how you choose to handle your finances as a couple, you should talk about and dedicate money to an emergency fund of 3 to 6 months' worth of living expenses.

Just because you have individual accounts doesn't mean you don't trust one another. Sometimes it's not convenient to discuss every single purchase in real time, and this can occasionally lead to misunderstandings and even overdraft fees at the bank. It's possible to make individual accounts into joint accounts so that you can see each other's financial activities, but agree not to use money from the other person's designated account without discussing it first, or unless it's an emergency.

Even if you have a 'joint account', you should still have a separate account for yourself, 'cause it gives you independence from your partner.


February 25, 2020


How to Manage Your Money as a Newly Married Couple.


Getting married is an exciting first stride into a new era of adulthood. What was one ‘you’ and ‘I’ now becomes ‘we’ and there is just so much to plan for the rest of your lives. It’s essential to see your life together as a partnership where you and your spouse will work together to overcome obstacles and achieve happiness for the years to come.



Steps.

1. Realize why financial matters are going to change. First of all, congratulations on this big step! Getting married is an exciting first stride into a new era of adulthood. What was one ‘you’ and ‘I’ now becomes ‘we’ and there is just so much to plan for the rest of your lives.

It’s essential to see your life together as a partnership where you and your spouse will work together to overcome obstacles and achieve happiness for the years to come. One of the most important factors most of newlywed couples will have to deal with is how to go about handling the finances after getting married.

2. Talk about your finances. If you haven’t yet discussed on how to manage your finances before the wedding, now is the best time to do so.

Don’t forget to make a list of all your incomes, debts and assets including loans and credit cards. This will help you out in comparing your spending habits and decide where you and your spouse’s priorities lie.

3. Get insurance coverage. There can’t be enough stress on the fact as to how important an insurance plan can be. They not only cover you financially, but also prove a savior at critical emergency situations. You may want life insurance to help repay the mortgage and take care of your children, should one of you die unexpectedly. Choose an insurance plan with low premiums for high coverage benefits.

What could be worse than any one of you suffering from critical health problem? Be sure you and your spouse are covered at all times with an insurance plan that takes care of your health especially if any one of you is working for hours that involves travelling for long durations.

4. Set common objectives. Whether its buying a car, renovating your home or even saving for your to-be child’s future, set the goals both of you would like to achieve together. Now try figuring out what you can realistically afford and start making disciplined savings. Also consider looking into making deposits in your savings account to keep you on track.

5. Avoid overspending. Keep track of every penny you and your partner spends. It’s easy to believe that two people who live together can live on a low budget too. Combining all the household incomes and expenses can help you save lots of money for your necessary expenses.

Image titled Manage Your Money as a Newly Married Couple Step 6

6. Avoid debts. Nothing can be more damaging than living on an overburdened debt. Taking mandatory debt like car loans, etc. is one thing but compiling credit card debt or personal loans can turn problematic for both of you. Ensure you will be able to pay for all your unsecured debts without jeopardising your savings.

7. Be smart about a shared bank account. Opening up a joint bank account would be ideal if you have common goals. But in a case where you would each one of you handle your own expenses, then it would be best to open up separate accounts. But be aware and honest as to where your money is being spent.



Question : What can I do if my wife thinks that I should be responsible for her, causing a financial stress leading to a dent in the relationship? As always, I am blamed for it.

Answer : If I think one thing and you think another, then just because your opinion is different than mine doesn't mean you're wrong. And neither is your wife. If her opinion is that you pay for everything, then that is a valid opinion. You don't have to agree with it, but she's not necessarily wrong. It's a negotiation. List your expenses and list your incomes, negotiate who pays what until you both agree. If you disagree with her point of view that "husband pays all", then you must negotiate - and she must compromise too - until you reach an agreement, any agreement, that you can both agree to.


February 25, 2020


How to Manage Your Money as a Newly Married Couple.


Getting married is an exciting first stride into a new era of adulthood. What was one ‘you’ and ‘I’ now becomes ‘we’ and there is just so much to plan for the rest of your lives. It’s essential to see your life together as a partnership where you and your spouse will work together to overcome obstacles and achieve happiness for the years to come.



Steps.

1. Realize why financial matters are going to change. First of all, congratulations on this big step! Getting married is an exciting first stride into a new era of adulthood. What was one ‘you’ and ‘I’ now becomes ‘we’ and there is just so much to plan for the rest of your lives.

It’s essential to see your life together as a partnership where you and your spouse will work together to overcome obstacles and achieve happiness for the years to come. One of the most important factors most of newlywed couples will have to deal with is how to go about handling the finances after getting married.

2. Talk about your finances. If you haven’t yet discussed on how to manage your finances before the wedding, now is the best time to do so.

Don’t forget to make a list of all your incomes, debts and assets including loans and credit cards. This will help you out in comparing your spending habits and decide where you and your spouse’s priorities lie.

3. Get insurance coverage. There can’t be enough stress on the fact as to how important an insurance plan can be. They not only cover you financially, but also prove a savior at critical emergency situations. You may want life insurance to help repay the mortgage and take care of your children, should one of you die unexpectedly. Choose an insurance plan with low premiums for high coverage benefits.

What could be worse than any one of you suffering from critical health problem? Be sure you and your spouse are covered at all times with an insurance plan that takes care of your health especially if any one of you is working for hours that involves travelling for long durations.

4. Set common objectives. Whether its buying a car, renovating your home or even saving for your to-be child’s future, set the goals both of you would like to achieve together. Now try figuring out what you can realistically afford and start making disciplined savings. Also consider looking into making deposits in your savings account to keep you on track.

5. Avoid overspending. Keep track of every penny you and your partner spends. It’s easy to believe that two people who live together can live on a low budget too. Combining all the household incomes and expenses can help you save lots of money for your necessary expenses.

Image titled Manage Your Money as a Newly Married Couple Step 6

6. Avoid debts. Nothing can be more damaging than living on an overburdened debt. Taking mandatory debt like car loans, etc. is one thing but compiling credit card debt or personal loans can turn problematic for both of you. Ensure you will be able to pay for all your unsecured debts without jeopardising your savings.

7. Be smart about a shared bank account. Opening up a joint bank account would be ideal if you have common goals. But in a case where you would each one of you handle your own expenses, then it would be best to open up separate accounts. But be aware and honest as to where your money is being spent.



Question : What can I do if my wife thinks that I should be responsible for her, causing a financial stress leading to a dent in the relationship? As always, I am blamed for it.

Answer : If I think one thing and you think another, then just because your opinion is different than mine doesn't mean you're wrong. And neither is your wife. If her opinion is that you pay for everything, then that is a valid opinion. You don't have to agree with it, but she's not necessarily wrong. It's a negotiation. List your expenses and list your incomes, negotiate who pays what until you both agree. If you disagree with her point of view that "husband pays all", then you must negotiate - and she must compromise too - until you reach an agreement, any agreement, that you can both agree to.


February 25, 2020


How to Discuss Finances Together in a Marriage.


Finances are a hot topic when it comes to all relationships, especially marriages. Saying “I do” means more than just sharing a life together, it also means sharing financial responsibility for that life. Whether good or bad, each spouse needs to be open and honest about his or her current financial standing. What’s more, the couple must work together to decide on important financial decisions for the future. Learn the basics for discussing money with your spouse.



Part 1 Communicating Effectively

1. Broach the subject casually with your spouse. The time to start talking about merging your finances is before the wedding, but at least 40% of couples avoid doing so.

Start the conversation with your action items first. This could mean starting off by talking to your spouse about your desire to look at your own credit score as you prepare to buy a house and suggest that he or she does the same. Say something like “Have you checked your credit report lately? I’ve been wanting to get a good picture of my financial standing. Maybe we can do it together?”

Things like credit scores for both of you may change how you approach buying a home, for example. You may find if one of you has a higher score than the other, it may be better to buy without both of you on the mortgage. However, things line up, remember you are on the same “team”.

2. Gather data to support your decisions. Print your credit reports and any supporting documentation, such as account balances and credit card debt. Financial choices need to be based on numbers not emotion. Make sure you both have a clear idea of what debts came into the union and how you can work to pay those down.

Early on you are doing this to get on the same page about your individual financial pictures. However, in the future, it may be nice to take time each month to sit down together and look over the numbers. Viewing credit card statements and account balances can be a way to keep you accountable as far as goals and also open the floor for an ongoing discussion with your spouse.

3. Be candid about any bad habits. Before you get started, you must be forthright with your spouse about any habits you happen to have that are not apparent on your credit reports.

An example of a bad habit would include not taking the time to write down purchases made on your debit card so you can balance your check book. When you were single, this may have not seemed like a huge deal, but with two people sharing accounts it can quickly become a problem.

Other bad habits you need to bring to your spouse would include past blemishes on your credit like having too many credit cards open, being in default on student loans or having bills in collection. All of these issues can impact credit, but they can also be addressed and resolved.

4. Refrain from pointing the finger. Placing blame and arguing over money will not make any issues better. If you ask your spouse to be honest about credit challenges and then start the blame game you will probably not get that same level of honesty in the future.

5. Listen to understand, not to reply. This means looking at your spouse as he or she is speaking, listening carefully to fully get his or her point of view, and then taking that one step further by confirming what you have heard.

When you sit down to have a tough conversation with your spouse, you will break the trust if you are not willing to listen. Don’t ask the tough questions unless you are ready to handle any answer.

The exchange of information should be fair and equal.



Part 2 Setting Ground Rules.

1. Decide if you will merge all the money or maintain separate accounts. Even after getting married there are no laws that say you have to merge all your accounts. Having separate accounts does not mean neither of you knows what the other is doing. Both partners should have access to the records of the other since you are sharing a household.

Depending on the credit scores for both spouses, it may make more sense to keep separate accounts especially if you want to buy a home soon. One spouse alone on a mortgage is going to have a higher chance of getting the loan than two people with mixed credit scores.

2. Determine who will be the primary overseer of your money. This will include how you make decisions about both small and large purchases. The person who is most organized and financially savvy may be the best choice for managing the finances. However, both partners should take on the responsibility in some way. So, choose duties according to your individual strengths.

For example, one of you may be better at saving, so you will be in charge of building an emergency fund and overseeing retirement savings. The other may be in charge of paying monthly bills and balancing the checkbook. Decide based on what’s best for you and your spouse.

3. Agree about which of you will handle certain expenses. You will need to know who is writing the check for rent, paying the electric bill and other household bills. You do not want to get into a situation where both of you thought the other paid the electric bill and you learn that it wasn’t paid when the lights are turned off. You also don’t want to pay bills twice and be short money.

Being upfront about how much both of you make and how you will divide the bills will make things much easier. Some families divide everything I half while others just pool their money regardless of who makes what.

The use of credit cards versus cash should also be explored as one partner may be used to always using a card and then paying it off once a month while the other only uses cash. This needs to be talked about.

4. Don’t make big purchases without your spouse’s blessing. Regardless of who makes more money, a big ticket item should be bought together. This is a good time to set boundaries about how much either of you can spend without talking to your spouse. This can be as simple as saying you have a spending limit of $100 without checking in since that is a low amount in your budget and won’t overdraw the account.



Part 3 Overcoming Money Troubles.

1. Build a household budget. This budget should include all the household bills, ongoing needs and bills that were outstanding from before you got married. The budget needs to be realistic and something you both commit to. Consider these tips:

Tally up every single monthly expense and plan for them in advance.

Include separate and joint goals.

Include long-term goals like saving for a down payment on a house.

Negotiate with ongoing bills to cut down interest rates or get rid of fees.

Automate whatever you can so that you don’t miss paying bills and acquire late fees.

Go back and revise your budget as needed.

2. Start building an emergency fund. If you didn’t already have an emergency fund before getting married, now is the time to build one. An emergency fund acts as a cushion in times when unexpected expenses pop up or one of you is out of work.

How big your emergency account is will depend on you and your spouse. Many families tuck away enough money for at least 3 to 6 months of expenses. This provides greater security over the long haul.

This savings account would be for true emergencies only, not impulse buys. Take the time to set boundaries as to what qualifies as an emergency.

Some households use a credit card for emergencies like car repairs. Make sure you both agree if this is a good use of your credit cards and leave the available balance for such an emergency. If either of you has problems with managing credit cards, this may not be the best option for your household.

3. Know your debt situation and decide on a strategy to pay it off.[13] Both of you should have a very clear idea of the other person’s debt as well as your own. Don’t fall prey to the idea that it’s your spouse’s problem—it’s not. Both of your debt is usually considered during major purchases, so working together to shrink each person’s debt is ideal.

It can also be helpful to get financial advising or attend a debt reduction course for couples. If you have a significant amount of debt—or have no idea where to start to pay it down—it may be practical to involve a professional who can assist you.

4. Plan for your retirements. Talk to your spouse and come up with a plan that suits both of you for retirement and start saving. Keep in mind, that men and women often have varying opinions when it comes to retirement, so be willing to compromise and consider your spouse’s perspective.

Include payments to 401K and other investments as a part of your budget. Part of this process also includes changing the beneficiaries for each account now that you are married.

If you don’t already, you also need to draw up life insurance policies to secure your spouse and your family in case of a tragedy.



Question : If we get a divorce, will my wife get 50% of my 401K too?

Answer : Honestly, this depends on the state and the county where you are getting divorced. Different locations have different rules of division in a divorce. Some states are equitable division, meaning you split 50/50 while others are not.



Warnings.

Money troubles have ended more than a few marriages. If you are both responsible, open and honest about money, it will make for a stronger marriage.

Be mindful that some people are sensitive about discussing money. To some, money means power and control and these are very volatile subjects. Handle with care.

It can be a difficult and uncomfortable transition going from being a single person in total control of your finances to being part of a couple. If your partner is resistant, give him or her time. If you can show them that you are interested in working as a team with no judgments, your spouse will eventually come around.
February 10, 2020


How to Discuss Finances Together in a Marriage.


Finances are a hot topic when it comes to all relationships, especially marriages. Saying “I do” means more than just sharing a life together, it also means sharing financial responsibility for that life. Whether good or bad, each spouse needs to be open and honest about his or her current financial standing. What’s more, the couple must work together to decide on important financial decisions for the future. Learn the basics for discussing money with your spouse.



Part 1 Communicating Effectively

1. Broach the subject casually with your spouse. The time to start talking about merging your finances is before the wedding, but at least 40% of couples avoid doing so.

Start the conversation with your action items first. This could mean starting off by talking to your spouse about your desire to look at your own credit score as you prepare to buy a house and suggest that he or she does the same. Say something like “Have you checked your credit report lately? I’ve been wanting to get a good picture of my financial standing. Maybe we can do it together?”

Things like credit scores for both of you may change how you approach buying a home, for example. You may find if one of you has a higher score than the other, it may be better to buy without both of you on the mortgage. However, things line up, remember you are on the same “team”.

2. Gather data to support your decisions. Print your credit reports and any supporting documentation, such as account balances and credit card debt. Financial choices need to be based on numbers not emotion. Make sure you both have a clear idea of what debts came into the union and how you can work to pay those down.

Early on you are doing this to get on the same page about your individual financial pictures. However, in the future, it may be nice to take time each month to sit down together and look over the numbers. Viewing credit card statements and account balances can be a way to keep you accountable as far as goals and also open the floor for an ongoing discussion with your spouse.

3. Be candid about any bad habits. Before you get started, you must be forthright with your spouse about any habits you happen to have that are not apparent on your credit reports.

An example of a bad habit would include not taking the time to write down purchases made on your debit card so you can balance your check book. When you were single, this may have not seemed like a huge deal, but with two people sharing accounts it can quickly become a problem.

Other bad habits you need to bring to your spouse would include past blemishes on your credit like having too many credit cards open, being in default on student loans or having bills in collection. All of these issues can impact credit, but they can also be addressed and resolved.

4. Refrain from pointing the finger. Placing blame and arguing over money will not make any issues better. If you ask your spouse to be honest about credit challenges and then start the blame game you will probably not get that same level of honesty in the future.

5. Listen to understand, not to reply. This means looking at your spouse as he or she is speaking, listening carefully to fully get his or her point of view, and then taking that one step further by confirming what you have heard.

When you sit down to have a tough conversation with your spouse, you will break the trust if you are not willing to listen. Don’t ask the tough questions unless you are ready to handle any answer.

The exchange of information should be fair and equal.



Part 2 Setting Ground Rules.

1. Decide if you will merge all the money or maintain separate accounts. Even after getting married there are no laws that say you have to merge all your accounts. Having separate accounts does not mean neither of you knows what the other is doing. Both partners should have access to the records of the other since you are sharing a household.

Depending on the credit scores for both spouses, it may make more sense to keep separate accounts especially if you want to buy a home soon. One spouse alone on a mortgage is going to have a higher chance of getting the loan than two people with mixed credit scores.

2. Determine who will be the primary overseer of your money. This will include how you make decisions about both small and large purchases. The person who is most organized and financially savvy may be the best choice for managing the finances. However, both partners should take on the responsibility in some way. So, choose duties according to your individual strengths.

For example, one of you may be better at saving, so you will be in charge of building an emergency fund and overseeing retirement savings. The other may be in charge of paying monthly bills and balancing the checkbook. Decide based on what’s best for you and your spouse.

3. Agree about which of you will handle certain expenses. You will need to know who is writing the check for rent, paying the electric bill and other household bills. You do not want to get into a situation where both of you thought the other paid the electric bill and you learn that it wasn’t paid when the lights are turned off. You also don’t want to pay bills twice and be short money.

Being upfront about how much both of you make and how you will divide the bills will make things much easier. Some families divide everything I half while others just pool their money regardless of who makes what.

The use of credit cards versus cash should also be explored as one partner may be used to always using a card and then paying it off once a month while the other only uses cash. This needs to be talked about.

4. Don’t make big purchases without your spouse’s blessing. Regardless of who makes more money, a big ticket item should be bought together. This is a good time to set boundaries about how much either of you can spend without talking to your spouse. This can be as simple as saying you have a spending limit of $100 without checking in since that is a low amount in your budget and won’t overdraw the account.



Part 3 Overcoming Money Troubles.

1. Build a household budget. This budget should include all the household bills, ongoing needs and bills that were outstanding from before you got married. The budget needs to be realistic and something you both commit to. Consider these tips:

Tally up every single monthly expense and plan for them in advance.

Include separate and joint goals.

Include long-term goals like saving for a down payment on a house.

Negotiate with ongoing bills to cut down interest rates or get rid of fees.

Automate whatever you can so that you don’t miss paying bills and acquire late fees.

Go back and revise your budget as needed.

2. Start building an emergency fund. If you didn’t already have an emergency fund before getting married, now is the time to build one. An emergency fund acts as a cushion in times when unexpected expenses pop up or one of you is out of work.

How big your emergency account is will depend on you and your spouse. Many families tuck away enough money for at least 3 to 6 months of expenses. This provides greater security over the long haul.

This savings account would be for true emergencies only, not impulse buys. Take the time to set boundaries as to what qualifies as an emergency.

Some households use a credit card for emergencies like car repairs. Make sure you both agree if this is a good use of your credit cards and leave the available balance for such an emergency. If either of you has problems with managing credit cards, this may not be the best option for your household.

3. Know your debt situation and decide on a strategy to pay it off.[13] Both of you should have a very clear idea of the other person’s debt as well as your own. Don’t fall prey to the idea that it’s your spouse’s problem—it’s not. Both of your debt is usually considered during major purchases, so working together to shrink each person’s debt is ideal.

It can also be helpful to get financial advising or attend a debt reduction course for couples. If you have a significant amount of debt—or have no idea where to start to pay it down—it may be practical to involve a professional who can assist you.

4. Plan for your retirements. Talk to your spouse and come up with a plan that suits both of you for retirement and start saving. Keep in mind, that men and women often have varying opinions when it comes to retirement, so be willing to compromise and consider your spouse’s perspective.

Include payments to 401K and other investments as a part of your budget. Part of this process also includes changing the beneficiaries for each account now that you are married.

If you don’t already, you also need to draw up life insurance policies to secure your spouse and your family in case of a tragedy.



Question : If we get a divorce, will my wife get 50% of my 401K too?

Answer : Honestly, this depends on the state and the county where you are getting divorced. Different locations have different rules of division in a divorce. Some states are equitable division, meaning you split 50/50 while others are not.



Warnings.

Money troubles have ended more than a few marriages. If you are both responsible, open and honest about money, it will make for a stronger marriage.

Be mindful that some people are sensitive about discussing money. To some, money means power and control and these are very volatile subjects. Handle with care.

It can be a difficult and uncomfortable transition going from being a single person in total control of your finances to being part of a couple. If your partner is resistant, give him or her time. If you can show them that you are interested in working as a team with no judgments, your spouse will eventually come around.
February 10, 2020


How to Ask Rich People for Money.

Fundraising for charity is an important part of any nonprofit group's work. In the U.S. alone, donors gave almost $287 billion in 2011. Many people who work for nonprofits feel uncomfortable asking donors for money, but without their help most nonprofit groups would not be able to carry out their missions. Learning how to effectively and respectfully ask wealthy individuals for money can help you ensure your charity or favorite nonprofit, federally recognized as 501 (c) (3), group prospers and is able to help those in need.

Part 1 Planning Your Donation Request
1. Compile a list of donors. Before you begin asking for money, it's best to have an idea of who you're going to ask for donations. If you're going door-to-door, that may be as simple as deciding which neighborhood(s) to work in. If you're soliciting donations by phone or by mail, though, you'll need a list of prospective donors to contact.
If you can identify past donors on your list of people to call or write to, you may want to prioritize those individuals as "best bets" - these are people who, given their history of donating in the past, will most likely contribute again to your cause.
Try to identify which people on your list are the most financially stable. You can do this by interacting with the individual to get a sense of his or her finances, or if going door-to-door, look at the houses residents live in and the cars in their driveways. People with large, elaborate homes or flashy sports cars most likely have more disposable income. (Though of course this doesn't guarantee that they will give donations.)
You can also look for potential donors by their other areas of spending. For example, does the prospective donor attend fundraisers for other organizations or individuals? If so, that prospective donor probably has the means to donate to your organization, if properly persuaded.
Consider using analytical software and services, such as Donor Search, to identify which potential donors are more wealthy and more likely to donate.
Remember to think "ABC" when identifying donors: Able to make a gift, Belief (known or potential) in your cause, and Contact/Connection with your organization.
2. Get to know your donors. If your organization has dealt with donors in the past, you or a colleague will probably know what strategies work best in making your appeal. Some people want to know how the money from last year was spent, while others may simply want to know how much is needed. Certain donors may have fears or reservations about donating, and it's important to learn to recognize those fears/reservations so you can address them in advance.
Some donors may need to hear particular terms or phrases in order to be persuaded to donate. If you know this to be the case, make some indication of this on your list so that when you call or approach that person, you'll know what to say.
Any time a donor seems reluctant to give but gives anyway, make a note of that situation on your list or in that donor's file (if you have one). Listen to what the individual says when he or she is reluctant, and try to find ways to assuage those fears - not just for this year's fundraiser, but for future years as well.
Be aware that many well-known philanthropists hire other individuals to manage donations and contributions. Because of this, you may not get to speak to the actual donor himself/herself. However, the employees hired by a philanthropist probably have the same concerns that the philanthropist does, and you may have some luck appealing to the philanthropist's interests through his or her employees.
3. Find ways to present your organization. People who have donated to your organization will no doubt be familiar with who you are (as an organization) and what you do. But what about people who have never donated before? How will you describe what you do to an outsider? This is important, as it may determine whether the individual will listen to the rest of your pitch. If possible, try to compile some data on what your organization has done in the past, the problems you hope to address after this fundraising drive, and how that prospective donation would help your cause.
Try to present your organization in a way that both explains what you do while also highlighting the issue you seek to change. For example, you might say something like, "Did you know that [the issue your organization addresses] affects a significant portion of the city, and we are the only organization solely committed to addressing these issues in a comprehensive way?"
It's not a requirement to have data compiled, but for individuals who aren't familiar with your organization, it may be very helpful to know that information.
Consider printing out a brochure or having a reusable chart to illustrate both the improvements you've made and the improvements you hope to make.
Think about what you might say if someone doesn't understand your organization's goals, or what you might say if someone was dismissive of your organization. Try putting yourself in those shoes - imagining that you were someone who didn't want to help the organization - and what you might say to the organization. Then imagine how you might respond to hearing those words.
The better your donor base understands your organization - and the better you understand your donors - the more likely you'll be to build a long-term relationship with that donor.
4. Practice your appeal. One of the best things you can do to strengthen your appeal for donations is to practice what you're going to say. That doesn't just mean knowing how to actually ask for money, but also knowing how to initiate the conversation, practicing scenarios, anticipating potential responses, and knowing how to direct (or re-direct) the conversation.
Remember that the best appeal will educate the potential donor, rather than making a simple sales pitch.
Practice your appeal out loud. Get comfortable with the speech, and learn to adapt it to your own style of speaking. Make it your own speech, and try to make it feel comfortable and unrehearsed (even though this may take a lot of rehearsal).
Practice in front of a mirror if you will be interacting with donors face-to-face.
Try recording yourself, either with a tape recorder or on video, and study your mannerisms and your speech patterns. Does it sound honest? Do your vocal patterns and your physical mannerisms communicate the message of your organization, and the urgency of what you're trying to solve?

Part 2 Asking for Donations.
1. Start a conversation. Don't just call and start running in with your pitch. Work on creating a dialogue with the potential donor, which may mean making some polite small talk at the start. It can be as simple as asking the person how his or her day is going. Anything to start a conversation should help disarm the individual, and make the person realize that you're a caring and concerned member of the community.
If the prospective donor is a known philanthropist, he or she may prefer to have someone who heads the foundation ask for a donation. Statistically, donors are more likely to give money to a recognizable figure affiliated with an organization, rather than to a fundraiser who contacts them on the organization's behalf.
Initiate the conversation by getting the prospective donor to acknowledge an existing problem. If you're raising money for a local organization, you might open the conversation by asking what he or she thinks is the greatest crisis facing your region.
2. Make your intentions known. You shouldn't just introduce yourself by asking for money, but you should make your intentions known near the end of your small talk. Start by asking how the person is doing, or commenting on the weather, and then use that as a lead-in to say, "I'm working with _______, and we're trying to help _______ be able to ________."
If the individual feels like you're just having an aimless conversation and then suddenly he or she is asked for money, it may create tension and cause the person to feel like you're shaking them down. Be calm, friendly, and casual, but don't drag your feet about making it clear that you have a purpose.
3. Let the other person speak. Chances are, if you launch into your usual appeal to a person on the street who's never donated before, that person will walk away. But if you have created a dialogue, and made room for the other person to speak, you may be able to get that individual to feel engaged and a part of the solution.
Try asking a Question : . Say something like, "What do you think is the biggest problem our community faces?" Once the person has answered, instead of simply saying, "Yes, you're right. Will you consider donating?" try a more nuanced approach. After the person says what he or she sees as the problem, just say, "How interesting!" and keep silent while remaining interested.
People fear silence, and the person will probably fill that gap by elaborating on why that issue is important. That potential donor may go on to talk about how a family member has been affected by those issues. This gives you an in to take the specific concern he/she has and run with it. It's no longer an abstract concern, but a specific problem that may have affected the individual personally.
4. Make a specific request. If you leave a donation appeal open-ended, the person may not end up donating, or may only give a few dollars. But if you ask for a specific amount, it takes a lot of guess work out of the equation for that individual, and makes it easier to commit to your request. For example, if the person seems interested, say something like, "Well, we can make a difference. For just _____ dollars, you can help accomplish ___________."
Another way to ask for a specific amount is to put the ball in their court. Ask something like, "Would you consider a gift of _____?" or "Is ______ something you'd be willing to consider to help tackle the problem of __________?"
5. Be persistent. Many people will say no right off the bat, but others may simply need to be persuaded a bit more. Perhaps someone might say that the amount you requested is too high. If that happens, let the person know that any donation amount would be a big help, and ask if there's a slightly lower amount that the person would be willing/able to donate.
Don't be aggressive with your appeal, but do be insistent that your cause is worthy and that any donation amount would help that cause.
6. Thank the person either way. If the individual is willing to donate, then it's cause for celebration. You can thank the person and let him or her know that that donation will go a long way towards solving or addressing the issue at hand. But even if the person is not interested in donating, you should still be polite and appreciative of their time. Simply say, "Well, thank you for your time and have a wonderful day."
Expressing gratitude and courtesy can go a long way. Just because someone isn't interested in donating, that doesn't mean the situation won't change. Perhaps next year the people who said no will have heard or read more about your organization, or perhaps the individual will have been personally affected by the issue you're seeking to address. Making a good impression now, even when turned down, may be what helps you get a donation next year.
7. Follow up with donors. If someone gave a donation, you should absolutely express gratitude. Send the donor a thank-you letter and a gift receipt (in case they want to write it off on their taxes or simply have a record of the donation). It's best to send these items as quickly as possible so that the donor knows that the contribution was greatly appreciated and will be put to good use.

Community Q&A.

Question : How do I ask a rich person for 50,000 dollars?
Answer : Follow the instructions listed in the article above. However, they will likely say no.
Question : How can I get money if I need it urgently?
Answer : Get a job, start a blog, make something, or ask for a small loan.
Question : How can I get help with my power bills and the foreclosure on my house?
Answer : There are probably social services nearby that can help.
Question : How can I raise money for my wedding?
Answer : Ask friends and family members if they are willing to pitch in some money to help fund your marriage. In return, send them invitations.
Question : How can I find money for my daughter's marriage?
Answer : Loans, relatives, friends, or you could try planning a wedding that won't cost you much!
Question : Where can you apply for a small business loan with bad credit?
Answer : You can try becoming a member of a credit union and try for a loan there.
Question : How do I ask for money if I am about to be homeless with an autistic son?
Answer : Ask family and friends, and tell them your situation. Look for government programs that can help, and depending on the age of your son, you may be able to get financial help for him. You can also ask family and friends if the two of you can stay with them while you get back on your feet. That way, you have an address while you look for a job.
Question : I need a loan to deal with a parent's sickness, what can I do?
Answer : Loans are not the only solution to sickness, there are organizations that provide affordable medical care. Search for these in your area. You might also consider launching a donation campaign through Kickstarter or another fundraising website.
Question : How can someone fund me to help me spread the word of God?
Answer : Try doing a simple fundraiser, like a lemonade stand or a car wash.

Tips.

Many people are more motivated to help you with money if they sympathize with your goals or interests. Try to tailor your appeal to each individual donor, based on how that donor seems to respond to the issues you address.
Always send a thank-you note to your donors, regardless of how much they sent you.
July 02, 2020


How to Start a New Life with No Money.


Starting a new life can be a great opportunity to make refreshing choices and decisions. However, doing so with no money can present a bit of a challenge as well. To make the most of your new life, start by creating a list of goals and keeping a positive mindset. Learn more about saving and your spending habits. Get a job to bring in additional income and reach out to your friends and family for assistance, if needed.

Method 1 Deciding How You Want to Live.
1. Be clear on why you are starting over. Spend some time determining whether or not you are creating a new life out of necessity or desire. If this is a choice based out of need, then you’ll want to identify what life improvements you will need to make as well. If you are making a decision based out of want, then carefully consider what your ideal life looks like.
For example, if you are starting a new life because you need some space from negative family members, then you might include limiting contact with these persons as part of your plans.
Or, if you are starting a new life because you want a challenge and some excitement, then you might consider placing yourself in a unusual circumstance, such as living in a foreign country.
2. Make any moving plans, if necessary. You may need to move to a new apartment or house in order to truly start over in the same city. Or, you may need to head out of the country entirely. Do as much research as you can online to determine the best way to use your limited funds. Look for locations where the cost of living is cheap and jobs are plentiful.
Find locations with affordable living options by selecting cities and then searching online for rent and food expense estimates. For example, in the Cook Islands you can find an apartment to rent for $130 a month.
3. Decide who to keep in contact with. Starting over can mean severing some personal ties, but it doesn’t always require breaking your bonds with your loved ones. Go through a list of all of your friends and family and determine what place they should have in your new life, if any at all. You’ll also want to consider how you will break the news to everyone that you’ve decided to start over, or if you will just stay silent about your choices.
For example, if you are trying to rebuild your finances and you have a relative who has a tendency to be a bad financial influence, then you will need to determine if you should continue to interact with them moving forward.
4. Keep a goal journal. Spend at least 15 minutes a day writing and thinking about your current situation and editing your goals. Try to create goals for a month, for one year out, for five years out, and for ten years out. Reassess your goals on a regular basis and change them if you need to. Make sure that your goals closely align with what type of life you’d like to lead in the future.
For example, you might write, “I would like to have $500 saved by the end of the year.” This will help you to be more financially stable, so it will likely fit with your lifestyle choices, too,
Make sure to think both big and small when setting your goals. Don’t be afraid to push for a goal that seems a long-shot.
5. Break down each goal into a series of actionable steps. Consider exactly what actions you’ll need to take for each goal and write them down as a sequence. As you decide to tackle that particular goal, look at this list as a reference. This will make larger goals seem more possible. This, in turn, will make you feel more in control of potentially difficult situations.
For example, if you plan to save money, then you’ll probably need to start by monitoring your spending or perhaps opening a savings account.
6. Seek out exciting, new experiences. It can be easy to get bogged down in the unknown or the unusual when you are starting over. Instead, force yourself to use positive adjectives when describing what you are experiencing. Change from using “weird” to “exciting,” for example. If you feel yourself getting too anxious, tell yourself to open your eyes and find one thing positive about your new environment.
For example, try to seek out the natural beauty of an area. Look for how the birds fly in the sky or how the sunlight comes through the trees. If you are stuck in an office all of the time, you can even print out these images and place them around you.
7. Give yourself positive encouragement. Starting over takes time and a great deal of work. Don’t expect everything to be in order overnight. Instead, be gentle with yourself and acknowledge all of your victories, even the small ones. Tell yourself throughout the day, “You are doing good.” Give yourself compliments as often as possible.
It is helpful to see your life as a book. This is just one chapter of many and does not necessarily tell you what the end will be. You are still writing it out.
You will also need to be watchful when you fail, so that you don’t let these moments set you too far off course. For example, if you make a poor spending choice with your limited funds, see if you can correct it as quickly as possible.

Method 2 Rebuilding Your Financial Life.
1. List out your debts. Take out a piece of paper or open up a spreadsheet on your computer. Write down all of the details regarding your debts. Include information about required payment amounts, due dates, and interest percentages. Update this list often and mark off the debts as you pay them off.
This will also allow you to see which debts need to be paid off first and which ones can come later. For example, it is always a good idea to pay off high interest credit card charges as soon as possible.
One entry on your list might look like, “American Express Card, $1,800 balance, 18% percent interest rate, $25 minimum payment per month.”
2. Develop a savings plan. Even without any money at present, it is still a good idea to consider what you will do with cash when you have it. Your goal should be to move away from a lifestyle that involves surviving paycheck to paycheck. This could mean finding a job and moving a certain percentage of pay into a savings account each month. This could also mean spending some time learning about saving on a site such as Learnvest.
There are also some handy spending “tricks” that you can learn, such as setting aside the change from your checking transactions using an app, such as Qapital.
3. Choose a thrifty lifestyle. Make a decision to pursue frugal, but safe, accommodations. If you are moving, select a location that will allow you to live in a thrifty way. Look into the cost of living numbers and consider the benefits of living within a city versus in a rural area, for example. You can also investigate saving money on transportation by forgoing a car.
For example, Panama is one location where you can live comfortably for around $300 a month.
4. Find a job. If do not have a paid position, then look for one by creating a solid resume. It might help for you to list out all of your skills before you begin applying for positions. You could contact a temp agency as well or just browse the job sites on your own. Make sure that you only apply for legitimate work opportunities.
You might also consider putting your skills to work by creating a business.
5. Create back-up plans. Without a financial safety net, there are many moments in life that you will need to navigate carefully. You’ll feel less anxious if you create at least one back-up plan for all of the major decisions and actions that you take. Try to think about both worst and best case scenarios.
For example, if you are saving money by cycling to work and your bicycle breaks down, what will you do? You might want to investigate public transportation as a back-up option.
6. Talk with a financial advisor. Go online and enter your city and “financial advisor.” Then, contact each advisor and ask if they offer any fee-free assistance. If they do, make an appointment and bring all of your financial paperwork with you to the meeting. They may also ask that you attend a financial support group with some of their other clients.
You can also find a forum for financial advice online and ask the members for tips on savings and tracking spending.

Method 3 Getting Help From Others.
1. Take advantage of government programs. Talk to government officials in your area to see if there are any assistance programs available to you. Consider these programs a temporary way to give your finances a boost in order to prepare you for future success. Make sure to follow all guidelines involved with the program.
For example, there are many government grants available to small business owners. Some of these grants can help you to start over with a new business even if you lack the initial funding. Check with the Small Business Association (SBA) for more details.
2. Ask your friends and family for help. Tell your friends and relatives about your goals and your plans to start over. See if they have any suggestions or advice. They might also be able to provide you will additional resources, financial or otherwise, to help you get on your feet.
Be aware that your story and choices may also help others to make positive changes in their own life. For example, you might have a friend who is struggling with credit card debt and could use any information that you learn about paying it down.
When talking to your friends and family members you might say, “I have very little money to work with, but I’m planning to get a job in an industry that guarantees regular pay and insurance as well.”
3. Consider staying with friends. Living expenses can very quickly destroy your budget and ability to save. If you have a friend or family member who is willing to let you “couch surf” for a while, you might consider this as a viable option. It will allow you to save up money and give you enough time to find a living situation that suits your frugal lifestyle.
You may also find that you are not the only person living in someone else’s home, especially in big cities. It is quite common for people to open their home’s to others searching for paid work in crowded, competitive areas.
4. Make lots of professional contacts. Every time that you talk with someone, try to consider how they could work as a professional contact for you. This may sound mercenary, but considering these connections can also make it possible for you to help them as well. When you are out in public, try to talk with the people that you encounter and be friendly as often as possible.
For example, if you are a waiter looking for work it never hurts to talk with the wait staff when you eat out at restaurants. They may be able to give you some tips regarding looking for a job in that area.
5. Talk with a therapist. Go online and enter your city and “therapist” into a search engine. Contact these professionals to see if any of them offer free sessions or group therapy. If so, this can be a great way for you to explore your past choices and how you can make changes for the present. In a support group, you can also find people who can be your friends in your new life.

Community Q&A.

Question : What if I hate my field and would definitely be required to get a degree I can't afford to get to be hired at the very bottom of the only field I think I might not be miserable in?
Answer : Some public libraries and business organizations offer free courses in many fields, with certificates upon completion. They could be classes that would be included to earn a degree and may become transferable college credit. A certificate could be the beginning to getting your foot in the door. Add to the certificate some volunteer work experience in the field. Submit this on your resume and gain contacts from your free certificate training and volunteer experiences that you might want to use for job references. Talk with your new contacts for tips on how they got started. Present all these at the interview for an entry position in your new field of work.

Tips.

When you are starting over it might be tempting to work all of the time, but make sure to give yourself breaks as well
June 02, 2020