Ray Dalio gives 3 financial recommendations for millennials

Ray Dalio gives 3 financial recommendations for millennials

By Jacob Wolinsky.
Founder, Chairman and Co-Chief Investment Officer of Bridgewater Associates Ray Dalio talks to Julia La Roche in 2018 of Yahoo Finance about the value of savings and investing.

These are Ray Dalio Gives 3 Financial Recommendations For Millennials.
Well I want to talk about my generation the millennials. We were really coming of age during the crisis. So how would you advise us to prepare. And what I mean is what would you tell our generation. We feel scarred from the crisis. First of all I think. One of the problems is that the experience that you had is the last experience is the one that's going to stick in your mind.

And probably will not be the one that's going to get you so that the next experience will be very very different. I know my my parents went through the Great Depression and then they missed out on the boom because they're always thinking about that. And so I think I think that what they need to do is see all of those crisis's. That's why you can see inflationary ones and see all of those and once you get that perspective I would say three things to your generation. OK. Three recommendations. The first recommendation. Is to is to think about your savings and how much money do you have for savings and the best way to think about that is to think how much money do I spend each month. And how much money do I have saved so that I can. How many months are my going to be OK without that and to savings. Right. And calculate it because savings in that is freedom and security. And think about what that is. So that's that's the first one. How much do I have for that.

The second thing is how do I save. Well what should I put my savings in. And when thinking about what you should put your savings in. Realize that the least risky investment that you think from volatility is the least risk investment. It which is cash is the worst investment over a period of time. And you could judge that by judging the rate of inflation in relationship to the after tax income you're going to earn. So if you have an inflation rate that's two or three percent and you're earning 1 percent and you have to pay taxes on that one percent or the 1 or 2 percent that you're going to get. You're going to get taxed essentially at two percent a year. And that's going to be a problem. So you have to move into assets that are other assets that are going to do better over a period of time. And when you do that the most important thing I can convey to you is to diversify well because I can guarantee you that one of those assets and you won't be able to pick the right one will be disastrous in your lifetime that you will lose half of that savings if you're in the wrong one and you won't know what the right one is. And so pick different countries pick different asset classes and I could probably take too long explaining how you might do that. But but. So that would be the second thing to learn from. First thing is think about how to save be cautious about debt when you're thinking about debt. Think about is that debt going to help my savings or is it going to produce an income.

Sometimes debt like buying a house or buying an apartment or buying an asset, it produces forced savings. Forced savings is a good thing. Or if you're taking on debt and you're thinking am I going to have that debt in an asset that asset debt or produce more income than the asset than the cost of your debt. If you're using debt for consumption that's not a good thing to do. OK you're giving up that that safety. So I want. So number one is think about how much you save and think about whether that should be how you borrow. Number two make sure that you think about the diversification of that not in cash. And number three. Do the opposite of what your instincts are. If you're going to play the game. It has to be the opposite of what your instincts in the crowd says because the market reflects the crowd. So you want to buy when no one wants to buy and you want to sell when no one wants to sell. Right. So and that's emotionally difficult and probably not going to play that game well because it takes a lot of resources to play with it. We spend hundreds of millions of dollars each year to try to play that game. Well and it's a tough game to play well. So I would caution you about the market timing game but I would say that if you're going to do it do it in the ways that are uncomfortable because they're opposite your instincts.

That's really good advice right. One more thing that really resonates with me in the book was if in the next downturn the implications could be the impact on pension obligations health care. Is my generation are going to be on the hook for that. Yeah. So we pay a lot of attention to debt. And we should. But pension obligations and healthcare obligations are just like debt.

August 11, 2020

How to Transfer Property After the Death of a Parent

How to Transfer Property After the Death of a Parent.

The death of a parent can be a traumatic and difficult time. However, if they left you some of their property, you may need to go to court to get that property transferred into your name. The process you'll use varies depending on whether your parent had a trust or a will. If they left behind a small estate and didn't have a will or trust, you can use an affidavit to take control of the property without going through probate. Regardless of how you transfer the property, you can't get started until you have a copy of your parent's death certificate.

Method 1 Transferring Property out of a Trust.
1. Go over the trust documents. Typically, the trustee will send notice to you within a couple of months after your parent's death. This notice includes information about your parent's trust as well as a copy of the trust documents. These documents detail the property your parent left in the trust and lists the people who are beneficiaries of the trust.
Trust documents can contain a lot of complex language and legalese. If you don't understand the information in the trust documents, you might want to have the trustee or an attorney go over the documents with you.
2. Contact the trustee named in the trust. If your parent's trust names someone as trustee, they will be responsible for settling the trust and distributing the assets. If your parent had a living trust in which they were the trustee, you'll be looking for the successor trustee.
If your other parent is living, they may be named as the trustee. If your parents were divorced, on the other hand, it's possible that you are listed as the trustee. However, if you are listed as a beneficiary of the trust, you can't also serve as trustee.
Some trusts list an institution, such as your parent's bank, as the trustee. Most institutions have specific individuals that serve as trustees on behalf of the institution.
Tip: If you are listed as the trustee, hire an attorney with experience in trusts to assist you. They'll make sure you follow all the legal requirements and fulfill your duties as trustee.
3. Wait for the trustee to pay creditors and taxes. The trustee is responsible for sending notice to creditors and paying all the debts and taxes that are owed by your deceased parent. In some situations, this involves selling assets from the trust to pay what is owed. With the typical trust, this shouldn't take longer than a year.
For example, if your parent owed $100,000 and the only asset in the trust was a house, the house would have to be sold to pay your parent's debt. Any leftover money would go to the beneficiaries of the trust.
4. Complete any necessary documents to transfer the property. The documents required to transfer property after all debts and taxes are paid depend on the type of property. For most personal property, no documents are required to transfer ownership of the property. However, you will need documents to transfer the ownership of real estate or titled property, such as cars or boats.
For example, if your parent left you their car, you would need the title for the car to transfer the ownership to your name. If the car was held by the trust, the title would be in the name of the trust. The trustee would fill out the title to transfer ownership from the trust to you.

Method 2 Going through Probate.
1. Read your parent's will to determine what property was left to you. Reading your parent's will can be a difficult task mentally and emotionally, especially if the two of you were close. You might want to get a friend or loved one to sit with you as you read it. Generally, the will lists your parent's property and the specific items they want to leave to specific people, if any. Some wills are relatively short and simply leave all of the person's property to one person, while others are more detailed.
Sometimes it can be difficult to find your parent's will, especially if they didn't tell you where it was before they died. Check safe deposit boxes or other places where you know your parent kept important personal papers.
Some people also file a will with the clerk of the county court. Although this isn't a legal requirement, it ensures that you can easily find the will. Call the county court in the county where your parent lived and find out if they allow people to file wills. If they do, they'll explain the procedure for retrieving your parent's will, if it's there.
If you know the name of your parent's attorney, call them and ask them about the will. If they drafted your parent's will, they might have a copy of it.
Tip: If your parent has significant assets, such as real estate, you may need to go through the probate process even if your parent didn't have a will. If there's no will, distribution of your parent's assets is determined by state law.
2. Calculate the value of your parent's estate. Courts have different requirements for probate depending on the value of your parent's estate. If your parent left few assets, you might be able to use simplified procedures that don't require as much time and effort as the full, formal probate procedures.
For this calculation, you're just looking for a ballpark estimate. Generally, if your parent owns real estate, they're probably over the threshold. However, if your parent only owns a vehicle and some personal property (such as furniture, clothing, and household goods), they likely fall below the threshold.
The specific threshold for formal probate varies among states. However, it's typically over $50,000.[8] In some states, such as California, it's as high as $100,000.
Tip: Assets that don't have to go through probate, such as life insurance policies or retirement accounts with a named beneficiary, aren't counted towards the value of your parent's estate for probate purposes.
3. Identify the personal representative of your parent's estate. Your parent's personal representative is the person who will be responsible for the administration of their estate, including paying their creditors and distributing their property. If your parent has a will, they likely named the person they wanted to be their personal representative.
If the personal representative your parent named in their will is not available, see if your parent named an alternate. If they didn't, you'll have to determine who is willing to serve in this capacity. Choose someone who is mentally and emotionally prepared to take on this role.
You can also hire a lawyer to serve as your parent's personal representative. However, this is usually a more expensive option than using someone who is a close friend or member of the family.
Avoid naming someone who is listed as a beneficiary in the will as your parent's personal representative. For example, if you know that you're getting the majority of your parent's property, you probably shouldn't serve as their personal representative.
4. Choose the correct probate court. Typically, you'll use the probate court in the county where your deceased parent lived. If your deceased parent owned property in a different county, you might also be able to use the probate court there.
For example, your parent might own a house in one county but spent the last few months of their life in a hospice in the neighboring county. In that situation, you would likely want to file your application in the probate court for the county where your parent's house is located.
If you call the clerk of the probate court, they can help you figure out which court you should use. You may also be able to find information on the court's website.
5. Submit your parent's will to the clerk of court. Some probate courts require you to submit the will you want to be probated before you file an application or petition to start the actual court process. Call the clerk's office. They'll be able to let you know if you need to submit the will and what the specific process is for doing that.
Usually, there will also be information about the process on the probate court's website.
Typically, you need to bring the will to the clerk's office in person. You may also need to submit copies of the will. However, before you submit the will, make at least one copy for your own records.
6. Complete an application for probate. The probate court you use will likely have a form that you can fill out if you're using simplified procedures. For formal probate, you'll typically have to hire an attorney to draft a formal petition.
You'll have to pay a filing fee when you file your application. These fees vary greatly from state to state and, in many states, even from county to county. However, they're typically a few hundred dollars. If you're filing the application yourself, you'll likely have to pay these fees out-of-pocket initially, but you can get reimbursed from your parent's estate.
7. Hire an attorney to assist with the administration of the estate. If you were chosen as your parent's personal representative, you'll typically want to hire an attorney to help you. The attorney's fees are paid by your parent's estate.
If your parent doesn't have substantial assets or a lot of debt, the administration of the estate might be relatively simple. In that situation, you might not need to hire an attorney, but you still definitely want to talk to one. Most attorneys who specialize in estate planning offer a free initial consultation.
If you are planning on hiring an attorney, it's a good idea to meet with 2 or 3 local attorneys so you can choose the one who best suits your needs. Also, make sure you pick someone you get along with because you're likely going to be working with them for at least a year.
Tip: Attorneys' fees for estate administration are typically determined by state law. In some situations, the judge might also order a set fee.
8. Attend court hearings as necessary to distribute property. With simplified procedures, you typically only have to go to court once. However, if you end up needing formal probate, you'll likely need to attend several court hearings for the judge to approve the distribution of property.
Formal probate proceedings can take anywhere from 6 months to a year for more complex estates. Expect it to take longer if your parent had a lot of debt, or if they had a substantial estate with numerous investments.

Method 3 Completing an Affidavit.
1. Create a list of heirs. List all of your parent's living relatives and show your relationship to them. If your parent died without a will, typically you need to be their next of kin if you want their property transferred into your name. If you are not the next of kin, or if you have other siblings, you'll need letters or affidavits from them stating that they have no interest in the property.
For example, if you have a sister and your parent has a brother who has 2 kids, you would typically list your uncle, 2 cousins, yourself, and your sister on your list of heirs. You and your sister would be considered your parent's next of kin, assuming your parent was divorced or your other parent was not living.
If you aren't close to your parent's family and have no idea who is still living, there are ways you can publish a notice of their death calling for heirs to come forward. The clerk of the probate court will help you with this.
2. Check with banks or other institutions for an affidavit form. Many banks and other institutions that might have control of your parent's assets have their own affidavit form. Using that form makes it easier to get your parent's property because the form includes all the information the institution needs to release the property to you.
For example, if your parent had a bank account, go to one of that bank's branches, explain the situation, and ask if they have an affidavit form for you to fill out.
The website for your state court system might also have affidavit forms that you can use. Banks and other institutions will also accept these forms, provided all the information they need is included on the form.
3. Fill out the affidavits that you need. The affidavit requires you to provide information about the death of your parent and any proceedings that are being conducted in court, or have already been conducted in court, regarding their estate. Typically, if you're transferring property using an affidavit, there won't be any court proceedings. You'll also need to provide details about the property that you want to be transferred to you.
If there are other heirs, they'll likely need to sign your affidavits as well. For example, if you have a sibling, they would need to sign the affidavit, even if you're the only one submitting it.
If someone else signs the affidavit who won't be present when you submit the affidavit, typically their signature needs to be notarized, even if yours does not.
Tip: Not all states require these affidavits to be notarized. However, some banks and other institutions may require it, so generally, it's a good idea to go ahead and sign your affidavits in front of a notary.
4. Gather ownership documents for the property. In addition to your parent's death certificate, the institution holding the property needs proof that your parent owned the property you're trying to take ownership of. Generally, the institution will tell you exactly what documents or information you'll need.
For example, if your parent had a bank account, you'll typically need to know the bank account number and the name on the account. You might also need your parent's debit card, if they had one. A recent bank statement would have the information that you need.
Some property has a specific ownership document. For example, if your parent owned a car, you would use the title in their name to prove their ownership. With their death certificate and an affidavit, you could then get the title transferred to your name.
5. Submit your affidavits to the relevant authorities. For titled property, such as cars or boats, you'll typically submit your affidavit to the local title office to get the title transferred to your name. For banking or investment accounts, submit the affidavit and supporting documents to the financial institution that's holding the account.
For items of personal property that don't have a title or other documentation, usually you can simply take it. You might consider getting a friend or family member to come with you to help clean out their place, or at least to be there for moral support.

Warnings.

You typically have to wait at least a month after your parent dies before you can take ownership of their property. Different states have different time requirements.
This article discusses how to transfer property after the death of a parent in the US. If you live in another country, the rules may be different. Consult a local attorney who specializes in estate planning.

May 07, 2020

How to Find a Home After Divorce with Limited Finances

How to Find a Home After Divorce with Limited Finances.

Divorce is an emotionally draining experience, and on top of everything else you need to find somewhere to stay. There are fewer options for people with limited finances. Since you probably can’t buy a home, you should find a cheap rental in a good location. If necessary, you can crash with friends or family or even try to stay at home with your ex-spouse until you save up enough money.



Method 1 Finding a Cheap Rental.

1. Search the Internet. Looking for cheap rental options is a little like searching for a needle in a haystack. However, there are cheap apartment rentals out there. Check websites such as Rent.com. A studio or a bedroom in someone’s house will probably be the cheapest to rent.

You might need a small place at first—really small. In expensive cities, you might get a 100 square foot micro-studio for under $1,000.

Also consider apartments in slightly shady neighborhoods. Check neighborhood crime rates at www.neighborhoodscout.com. Remember that your first home after a divorce doesn’t need to be your permanent home.

2. Contact hotels. You might only need a temporary place to stay, e.g., for a month or so. In some countries, such as Canada, a lease must be for at least 12 months. Your only option for short-term housing might be to stay in a hotel or motel.

Many national chains have extended-stay hotels. Call and ask about rates.

Renting a hotel this way is more expensive than renting an apartment. However, it’s more convenient if you need short-term housing.

3. View the apartment. Call up the landlord and ask to see the place. No matter how desperate you are, you shouldn’t rent a place without first viewing it. Some cheap apartments are unsanitary and unsafe.

Make sure the apartment is close to work or accessible by public transportation.

Check your cell phone reception. You can save money if you just use your cell phone and skip the landline.

Also confirm that there is enough water pressure. Flush the toilet and turn on the taps.

4. Check your credit. More and more landlords are looking at people’s credit history before deciding to rent to them. Pull your credit score and credit history. If your score is low, try to clean up your credit history quickly.

There may be errors on your credit history that are pulling down your score. For example, your ex-spouse’s debts might show up on your credit report, or accounts might wrongly be listed as in default. Dispute any credit report errors. It usually takes a couple months for inaccurate information to come off.

5. Ask if you can forego a security deposit. Landlords typically want a month’s rent as a security deposit to protect them in case you damage the apartment or skip out before the end of the lease. If you have good credit or a long rental history, you can ask the landlord if you can rent without paying a deposit.

If necessary, check whether you can put your rent on a credit card. It’s not an ideal solution, but it will help you get a roof over your head. You can pay the credit balance down once you get re-established.

6. Get a roommate, if necessary. Any apartment is cheaper if you have someone splitting the bills. You can advertise for a roommate on websites such as Craigslist, though it is better if you know the person already. Confirm that the lease allows you to have a roommate, because not all leases do.

If you have to advertise, ask any potential roommate for references and one month’s security deposit.

Be very clear about your expectations regarding cleanliness and having guests over.



Method 2 Staying with Friends or Family.

1. Call them up and ask. Don’t show up at someone’s doorstep with a suitcase, but call ahead of time. Ask if you can stay with them for a little bit. Give them a deadline when you anticipate moving out.

For example, you can say, “Mom, I need to come home. Is that okay? I’ve only got a few hundred saved. But if I can stay with you for two or three months, I’ll be back on my feet.”

2. Save money fast. You can’t sleep on someone’s couch forever, so cut all unnecessary expenses and take on a part-time job if possible. Build up enough money to afford a security deposit on a small apartment.

A part-time job might be ideal since it will keep you out of the house. Check Craigslist for part-time gigs such as dog walker, Uber driver, or bartender.

3. Be a model guest. People are doing you a huge favor by letting you crash with them for a little while. Make things easy on your host by keeping your space clean, not making noise, and being respectful when your host has guests.

Wash dishes or prepare meals without asking. This will relieve your host’s stress.

Avoid draining your friend’s electricity by charging up your computer and phone on their dime. Instead, find a public café or recharge while at work.

Keep complaints to yourself. Do you think the sheets are scratchy? Consider yourself lucky to have a place to stay.

4. Follow house rules. Your friends might have rules that seem weird to you. That’s not the point. You need to follow them if you don’t want to get kicked out. Ask about anything that seems unclear.

Some rules are unspoken. Pay attention to your host’s habits. For example, if they only watch TV with the volume down low, do the same.

5. Buy your own food. You should prepare your own meals so that your host doesn’t feel like they have to wait on you. Ask your friend where the nearest grocery store is and load up on food. Make sure there’s enough room in the refrigerator.

6. Volunteer to cover expenses. You can build goodwill by volunteering to buy food or paying other bills. For example, pick up a large pizza on your way home from work and invite your host to share.

7. Leave when asked. Someone might need you to leave before you want to. Gather your things and thank them. Then call up other family or friends to find a place to stay.

Remember to clean up after yourself. Remove any trash and wash the sheets or vacuum the sofa you slept on. Don’t leave anything behind.



Method 3 Living With Your Ex.

1. Talk to your ex. No law says you must leave your home after a divorce. If you have no money, you might be best off sitting tight until you’ve managed to save up enough for an apartment. Of course, you’ll need your ex spouse’s permission—especially if they were given the house in the divorce decree.

If your ex doesn’t want you in the house, volunteer to stay in the garage or in a guest house.

Staying in the house isn’t an option if there’s been any history of domestic violence, or if there is a restraining order against you.

2. Contribute to the bills. You should split shared costs, such as property taxes, insurance, electricity and—if you can afford it—the mortgage. Sit down with your spouse and talk about what you will contribute.

If you don’t have any money, volunteer to do things around the house. You can cook all meals, make repairs, and clean.

3. Come up with a schedule. Try to limit contact as much as possible. Staying in the house will be uncomfortable for everybody, but a detailed routine can make things easier. If your ex thrives on conflict, then limiting contact will be beneficial.

For example, you might get up an hour earlier than your ex and come back home an hour earlier. Schedule when you’ll use the bathroom and the kitchen.

4. Be considerate. You might have been a slob while married, but now you need to clean up after yourself. Become the ideal roommate. Follow these rules.

Wash your own dishes.

Eat only the food you buy. If you want something your ex bought, ask first.

Volunteer to clean shared spaces, such as bathrooms, and mow or rake the lawn.

5. Avoid bringing dates home. Your ex might hit the roof, and who can blame them? It’s terribly rude to start dating in front of your ex-spouse. If you want to date, then meet outside the home and don’t bring them back.

There’s also no reason to advertise that you’re dating. Keep that news to yourself.

6. Reduce conflict. If you have children, they will be harmed by constant fighting. As long as you are staying in the house, you need to commit to living peacefully. You can defuse tension by practicing the following.

Listen to your ex-spouse and avoid getting defensive. If your ex complains about your habits, avoid the temptation of starting a tit-for-tat argument. After all, your ex might have a legitimate grievance.

Don’t revisit the divorce. You’re living at home for financial reasons, not because you want to pick apart why you divorced in the first place.

7. Leave as soon as possible. Staying in the house should be a temporary solution. Some people get comfortable being part of a couple even when they are no longer married. For your own personal growth, you should move out as soon as you can afford it.



Method 4 Considering Other Options.

1. Rent a motor home. If you need a temporary place to stay, rent an RV or buy a used one. Ask friends or family if you can park on their property. If you don’t know anyone, you can park at a local campground for a fee. Recreational vehicles typically have sleeping, dining, and bathroom areas.

You can find rentals online or by looking in your telephone book. Shop around for the most competitive price.

2. Apply for housing assistance. In the U.S., low-income people can apply for a Section 8 voucher. You find a landlord willing to accept the voucher and rent directly from them. The voucher then subsidizes your rent. Contact your nearest Public Housing Authority to apply.

There are income limits for eligibility. Typically, your income shouldn’t exceed 50% of the median income of a family your size in the county or city where you want to live. For example, the median income for a single person might be $25,000. Your income will need to be $12,500 or less.

Even if you qualify, there’s usually a long waiting list. You might need temporary shelter.

3. Get a room at the Y. Your local YMCA or YWCA might have rooms for rent. Generally, they will charge by the day, week, or month, and you can book online. A night at the YMCA in the Upper West Side costs around $100 a night. This is pricey, but a decent choice if you need a place to crash for a couple days.



Tips.

If you have children but are not receiving child support, contact your local child support agency immediately. They can track down missing parents, establish paternity, and get a child support order in place.

February 25, 2020

How to Prevent Arguments About Finances

How to Prevent Arguments About Finances.

Money and finances are one of the most common sources of conflict for couples. Money problems can stem from not being open about your finances and having differing views of how money should be spent. To help prevent fights about finances, discuss each other’s views about money, come to a compromise that respects both your values, communicate about your finances openly, and set goals to help keep your finances in order.



Method 1 Discussing Your Views About Money.

1. Talk about your view on money. One of the money problems that arises between couples is due to their differing position on money. Some people are spenders and others are savers. These two mindsets can strongly clash. To help get past this problem, you should talk about these differences.

During this discussion, talk about whether you are a saver or spender.

Having open communication about your ideas and feelings on money can help you start to solve or eliminate problems.

For example, you may say, "I believe that money is hard-earned and should be enjoyed." Alternately, you may say, "Saving money is important to me. We work too hard for it to spend it often."

2. Discuss what money means to you. Often, the arguments about finances aren’t about money specifically, but about what money means to the people in the relationship. To help prevent any financial arguments, you and your partner should explain to each other what money means to you and what it signifies. This can help you understand each other.

For example, you may think that saving money means safety and security. You may think that saving money or spending it can show love and affection. Saving money may make you feel in control and like you have power.

You may feel that you deserve to spend your hard earned money on yourself, or you may feel that you deserve to save your hard earned money for future plans.

Determine if you or your partner use money as a way to measure success, status, or keep score with others.

Make sure to discuss any fears you have about money and the way that your family approached money growing up.

For example, you may say, "Saving money makes me feel safe. When we were growing up, we had no money, so having a savings account helps me feel like I'm taking care of my family."

3. Acknowledge your differences about money with an open mind. After you have discussed what money means to both of you, you should use the opportunity to understand each other’s position and ideas about money. You should not point fingers or try to make one of your right and wrong. There is nothing wrong with having different values about money. You have to work towards understanding, accepting, and compromising.

For example, work on understanding why your partner feels that spending money is something they have earned and deserved. Try to see how saving money makes your partner feel in control and safe.

Both you and your partner are two different people, which means you are not going to have the same opinions about everything. Communicating about your ideas of money can help prevent and avoid misunderstandings.

If your partner has illogical, irresponsible, or contradictory ideas about money, that is a separate issue. You want to accept different ideas about money, yet help your partner work through illogical money ideas that may harm your family.

Try saying, "I understand that you want to save money though I like to treat myself for my hard work. Can you explain to me why saving money is so important to you? I will explain to you why I think we deserve to spend some of our money."

4. Compromise with both of your sets of values. After you have figured out what each of you feels about money, you can then work on a compromise. Compromise means you both stay positive as you find a way to negotiate both of your values. Find some common ground that benefits you both. You should work on finding ways for both of your to compromise equally so one person isn’t giving up more than the other.

For example, you may come to a compromise where you set aside money each month to spend on yourself while your partner sets aside a similar amount to save. You both can come to an agreement on what things are considered special splurge purchases, and decide what you want to save money on to purchase or invest in in the future.

5. Take a break and come back to the discussion. If you and your partner are discussing money and start arguing or yelling, stop the conversation and go do something else. Stepping away for a moment will help you and your spouse have time to calm down and think more logically about what has been said.

You and your partner will not always agree about money. However, it is crucial that you learn how to compromise so you can meet everyone’s needs and address each other’s concerns.



Method 2 Communicating Effectively About Finances,

1. Be open about your finances. One way to help prevent arguments about money is the be open about your finances with your partner. This helps each of you be on the same page, so you won’t be keeping secrets about money or lying about money. These behaviors can cause problems and arguments.

When your relationship gets to the point where you start sharing bills and financial responsibilities, you should be open about all of your finances. This includes your debt, income, and financial obligations.

Tell your partner, "I want to share my finances with you. I have some student loan debt, a car payment, and two credit cards."

2. Keep your partner in the loop. You should share vital financial information with your partner so that you both stay informed of each other’s financial situation. This includes any changes to your income, tax returns, and credit reports. This helps maintain honesty and communication between you, and you can avoid potential problems if you keep something from your partner.

This often happens at the beginning of a partnership, when you let your partner know your financial situation. However, you should continue doing this throughout the relationship, especially if things change significantly.

For example, you may say, "My credit report has changed recently due to my recent bill payments. I'd like to go over what changed the credit report with you."

Another way to prevent arguments is to agree to text or call if you are thinking of purchasing something over an agreed upon spending limit, such as $100. If you or your partner is out shopping and finds something above the agreed upon limit, then sending a quick text or making a quick phone call may prevent an argument later on.

3. Establish weekly money talks. Another way to help prevent fights about money is to discuss any minor problems before they can turn into something worse. Getting together with your partner once every week or two to discuss the budget and any minor problems can help keep the lines of communication open and help prevent fights.

For example, you may get together and discuss how one of you spent more on groceries than was budgeted, or another minor financial problem. Addressing the problems early can help prevent the small things from turning into major problems.

You may say things like, "We went over the budget on groceries, but by cutting a few corners, we can adhere to it next month."

4. Talk about how you will approach helping out family. Many people help out family members financially. However, this can cause a lot of problems and arguments. To help prevent this, talk about what you and your partner want to do about helping out family members so you have a procedure in place.

For example, you may decide to help out a family member up to a certain dollar amount or a certain number of times each year. You may decide that you want to help out certain family members but not others. Discuss these issues with your partner and come up with a solution that you both can handle.

You may say, "I understand that your parents struggle, but we can only afford to help them for this set amount of money three times each year."



Method 3 Setting Financial Goals.

1. Create a budget. Budgets can help prevent a lot of arguments about money. Budgets create a solid plan for your money so there won’t be any questions or confusion about where the money goes and when. Budgets give you and your partner a guide to help stay on track where money is concerned.

If one partner has trouble adhering to the budget, you can look at the numbers and find areas that need improvement or adjustment.

Make sure to budget in money for extra purchases, such as an impulse buy or going out to dinner.

Include each of your money interests in the budget. If you like to spend money but your partner likes to save, budget those things in each month.

If budget has a negative connotation, consider calling it a “spending plan” instead of budget.

2. Share financial tasks. To help keep the financial responsibilities even and a joint effort, come up with a way share tasks and assign a duty to each person. This helps take all the pressure off one person and lets you work together to manage your finances.

For example, you may pay the bills while your partner makes and maintains the budget. You may focus on the savings account while your partner invests money.

3. Come up with long term goals. Figure out what your long term goals are for your money. Do you want to invest? Are you saving for a new car or house? Are there kids in the future? Do you want to take vacations? Each of these future plans are important. You should discuss what you and your partner want in the future and come up with a way to approach it.

Most of these purchases require pre-planning and saving. Prioritize what you want to save your money for.

4. Approach finances as a team. To help keep your finances running smoothly and eliminate any potential conflicts, work on your finances as a team. Even though one person may be in charge of the budget or paying the bills, you should talk about these ideas and sit down once a month to discuss the month’s finances.

You may decide to pay bills together and do the budget together instead of assigning the task. You may also switch back and forth and do a different financial task each month.

5. Consider having separate accounts. If finances and spending habits are a frequent source of frustration in your relationship, then you and your partner might consider setting up separate bank accounts and just maintain a joint account for your shared bills and savings. This may help to prevent arguments about finances if you each have a set amount of money to spend on whatever you want each month.

6. Seek professional help. If you and your partner fight too often about finances, you can seek professional help. You may want to visit a therapist who specializes in resolving conflicts in relationships. This can help you get past any barriers and help you learn how to compromise.

You may also want to visit a financial planner. Financial planners can help you figure out how to budget and compromise on financial issues.

February 25, 2020

How to Help Elderly Parents With Finances.

How to Help Elderly Parents With Finances.

Helping your elderly parents with finances can be a tricky thing to do. It can be frustrating for you and can cause hurt or embarrassment for your parents. If you go about it with discretion and respect, though, you can streamline your parents’ finances and remove a lot of stress from your and their lives. By communicating properly, budgeting, and simplifying their affairs, you’ll be able to help your elderly parents with their finances. In the end, you and your parents might be come closer, and you'll both have a lot less to worry about.



Method 1 Budgeting.

1. Find out their sources of income. Sit down with your parents and ask them to list their sources of income. If they are unable to list their income, keep an eye on their mailbox and wait for checks to arrive. In addition, contact their bank to find out if they have recurring direct deposits into their accounts. Some sources of income might include.

Social security.

Pensions.

Retirement accounts that include stocks, CDs, and bonds.

Real estate holdings.

2. List their expenses. After you’ve determined your parents’ income, you’ll need to list their expenses. You can also do this by sitting down with them and asking them to list expenses. However, if they can’t remember, you’ll have to wait on bills to arrive in the mail or for businesses to call them asking for payment. Some common expenses include.

Phone.

Cable and internet.

Utilities like electricity, gas, and water.

3. Meet with professionals who manage their affairs. In addition to getting records from your parents and tracking them down yourself, you should also meet with any professionals who manage aspects of your parents’ affairs. This includes lawyers, accountants, management companies, insurance agents and brokers. They will likely have valuable information about your parents' finances you need.

Don't be intimidated by professionals you may have to meet with. In most cases, they'll be happy to help you and your parents.

4. Cut expenses, if needed. Once you’ve gathered a list of their income and expenses, you’ll have a very good idea of what they can afford and what they can’t afford. When you have this information, start trimming expenses. This way, your parents’ income and savings will last them a lot longer than it would otherwise. Some things to cut include:

Cable.

Very large life insurance policies.

Magazine and newspaper subscriptions.

Charitable donations.

Cars or homes that have been financed.

5. Raise money for your parents, if they need it. In the case that your parents don’t have the income to meet their expenses, you’ll have to raise money to help them. There are a variety of things you can do without reaching into your own savings account. Consider:

Selling their home or getting them a reverse mortgage. A reverse mortgage is a loan that the borrower does not need to pay back until they sell the home.

Auctioning cars and other valuable possessions. Your parents might have valuable artwork, a car collection, or a piece of land somewhere that could be sold. That money may be just enough to meet their expenses.

Avoid taking loans or selling your parents' property before talking to them about it.

6. Find out if there are entitlements they are eligible for. In addition to identifying their current sources of income, you may be able to find entitlements or other sources of income for your elderly parents. To do this, check with your local, state/regional, or national governments. Don't worry, though, there are many resources available that will make this search easy.

For people in the United States, visit http://www.benefitscheckup.org to identify new sources of financial help for your parents.



Method 2 Organizing Their Affairs.

1. Get a power of attorney. A power of attorney will give you the legal right to act on your parents’ behalf in managing financial (and legal) aspects of their life. As a result, you’ll have the right to talk to your parents’ insurance companies, bank, pension administrators, and more. Without a power of attorney, you’ll have serious problems managing your parents’ finances.

2. Reduce the number of credit cards and checking accounts they have. Shut down all checking accounts and close all credit cards except for one or two. It will be very difficult for you to monitor their finances if they have many cards and accounts. Ultimately, it’ll be easier for you to follow one card and one checking account.

Verify that accounts and cards you intend to close do not have automatic payments or direct deposits attached to them.

3. Set up automated payments. Contact all the businesses that your parents have regular or recurring payments with. Provide them with a credit card number or a bank account number from which they can draft money that they are owed.

You may be able to do this through the business’s website.

4. Hire someone to manage their finances. If your parents’ finances are too complicated or their estate is too large for you to manage on your own, you may need to hire a third party to help you. In this event, a financial advisor, management company, or a law firm may be able to help you help your parents.

Determine if you or your parents have enough money/income to employ a professional financial manager.

5. Get their tax information. Ask your parents for their prior income tax returns. If they can’t find them, ask their accountant. With their tax information, you’ll be able to file the current year’s taxes, consolidate loans, and much more.

If you are unable to get tax information from your parents or their accountant, visit https://www.irs.gov/individuals/get-transcript to get transcripts of prior years taxes. Remember, though, you’ll need to have a power of attorney to do so.

6. Have them write or update their will. One aspect of your parents’ finances that they might neglect is their will. Their will is important as it will allow their estate to be settled relatively easily if they pass away. While this will probably be a tough conversation for both of you, you should ask them to write a will.

7. Document everything you do. Keep good records of everything you do for your parents. This includes keeping copies of checks you write, holding onto receipts for things you pay for, and taking notes of complicated financial issues. If you don’t document things well, you could find yourself in a legal battle with a sibling later on.



Method 3 Communicating Properly.

1. Ask if they want help. Before you take matters into your own hands and try to take control of your parents’ finances, you should ask them if they want help. Depending on their personality and position, they may respond negatively or affirmatively. Whatever their response, you'll at least open up communication and let your parents know that you are thinking of them.

If your parents are terminally ill or intellectually diminished, you may not need to ask them. Instead, talk to them and let them know you are going to try to organize their affairs.

2. Respect their wishes. Depending on your parents’ circumstances, you should respect their wishes as best as you can. If you disregard their wishes, you’ll probably alienate them and poison your relationship. By respecting their wishes, you’ll turn managing their finances into a positive experience.

3. Keep them involved. While you may be tempted to just take care of everything yourself, make sure that you keep your parents part of the discussion for a long as you can. This is important, as you don’t want them to ever be surprised about where they stand financially. In addition, if they stay active, they might fare better in terms of their health.

Schedule monthly meetings with your parents to talk about their finances. At the very least, take some time to let them know where they stand.



Tips.

Keep an eye out for signs of dementia; this is a signal to start taking great control of your parents' assets.

If you are working with your parents' finances, be sure and keep siblings informed in writing. This will help alleviate any tension about financial matters when your parents pass away, as that sibling or those siblings will be aware of what the state of your parents' finances are.

Warnings.

Educate your parents about scams. Request that they not mail any large payments to anyone for any reason without discussing it with you first.

February 25, 2020

How to Prepare Your Finances for a Job Leave.

How to Prepare Your Finances for a Job Leave.

Working people depend on having an income to live. You need to pay for housing, food, health care and many other things. Nevertheless, there may come a time when you want to be able to leave your job. The most common reasons are either retirement or a temporary leave to change jobs or careers. Whatever your reason for wanting to leave work, you will need to make financial plans. You will need to set aside some savings and make changes to your spending. Your mortgage and insurance costs will be an important part of the picture as well. With adequate planning, you can make it happen.



Method 1 Setting a Target.

1. Choose a date. Some people may decide at the start of their career that they want to work to age 50, or 55, or some other number. If you would like to make this a goal, you need to set your target and then work toward it. Claiming to have a goal means nothing unless you take steps to get there, but your first step is to decide what you want.

2. Identify an event. Your target to leave your present job may be some event, such as reaching a particular level of expertise or the day your supervisor leaves. Some of these targeting events may be under your control, and some may not. The less certain the event, the more prepared you will need to be.

For example, you may have decided that you want to leave your present company if they ever sell out or merge with some other company. Since you cannot control something like this and may not know when it is coming, you should try to have some alternative source of employment at least in mind for when the time comes.

In the event of a maternity leave, you may not know for years exactly when it is coming, but then in the final nine months (or so) you will know almost exactly. You can plan in general to have some savings set aside, and then when you get pregnant you can begin making some specific last-minute preparations.

Sometimes, the "event" that triggers a temporary leave might be a long-term illness, either yours or someone you need to care for. This can come with almost no advance warning. You need to plan for the general contingency and make some emergency preparations.

3. Plan a savings target. This is probably the most controllable concept. You can sit down with a financial planner and decide how much money you would need to have in savings to allow yourself and your family to survive adequately without your income. Then work toward setting aside that amount of money. As time goes by and interest rates fluctuate, you may need to adjust your plans accordingly. However, setting the target and doing the work up front will help you be as prepared as you can be.

If your target is to retire early, financial experts recommend that your savings target should be about 25 times your annual salary. You will then be able to withdraw money at the rate of about 4% per year.

If you target is to be able to leave work temporarily to look for a new job or another reason, then your target will be whatever amount you need to meet your expenses for that time. For example, the average job search is approximately four to six months, so you should plan to have savings to cover your living costs for that long.



Method 2 Reaching Your Target.

1. Work with a financial adviser. If you want to plan for leaving your job, you should enlist the help of a qualified financial adviser. Someone with expertise in investing can help you decide how much you need to save and can help you find the best ways to invest. If you want some help with finding a qualified financial adviser, read Hire a Financial Advisor or Select a Financial Advisor.

2. Invest your savings carefully. Working with your financial adviser, you will want to do more than just place your earnings in a bank account. Simple savings accounts earn very low interest. You will do better to invest in bonds, stocks or other securities, in accordance with your adviser’s opinions.

Investing works best when you begin as early as possible. Your best ally when saving is time. Your interest compounds more effectively when you begin early.

If your focus is to be able to take a temporary leave at some time, then you may need to have your savings in a readily accessible account. Long-term IRA savings are good for retirement planning, but you may need to be able to withdraw money sooner. Work with your adviser to find the best investment or savings plans for your needs.

If you want to plan for a lengthy, temporary leave, such as for a maternity or family illness, you will want to have savings in some readily accessible account. A short-term bond or money market may be the best bet, or even a simple savings account that you earmark for such an emergency.

3. Cut your expenses as much as possible. Many people live their lives from month to month and use a great deal of their income. If you manage a budget this way, you will do fine from month to month, but you will greatly delay your savings plan. If your goal is to be able to leave work, you should begin by cutting expenses as much as possible.

To begin cutting expenses, start by listing them all. Then review how you spend your money over a one- to three-month period and identify the expenses that you believe you can live without. Perhaps you can reduce the number of times that you go out to dinner. Maybe you can cut some entertainment expenses.

Manage your utilities. Try to reduce some of your monthly expenses by reducing utility usage in your home. Manage the heat, turn off lights, and do what you can to save water. These sound like small steps, but over time they can all add up.

Cutting expenses is a powerful financial tool for any job leave, whether permanent/retirement or a temporary leave for illness, maternity or some other reason. You need to consider the absence from work as an overall change in your lifestyle.

4. Plan to spend some on your new job search. Part of setting your target, if you are anticipating leaving your current job, should be to have some savings available to spend on a search for a new one. You will need money for correspondence, printing resumes, travel, parking, and possibly one or two new interview suits. You should anticipate these costs, estimate the amount of money that you will need, and set this aside as part of your target savings.



Method 3 Handling Your Mortgage.

1. Recognize the importance of your mortgage. For most people, housing payments make up the largest expenses they have. If you are paying rent, rather than owning your residence, those monthly payments are effectively doing nothing for you. If possible, purchase a property and get a mortgage. In this way, your monthly payments will be building equity for you. At the end of your mortgage, you will own the property outright in your own name.

2. Aim for your target date. As much as possible, try to align your mortgage to your target retirement date. That is, if you are relatively young and just starting out, then you may want to get a 30 year mortgage to last the duration of your career. However, if you can afford the monthly payments of a shorter mortgage, you will be setting aside money toward your equity at a faster rate.

3. Refinance when possible. When mortgage interest rates go down, you should try to refinance. By refinancing, you will get a lower interest rate and reduce your monthly payments. You may also take that opportunity to refinance into a shorter term. For example, if you started out with a 30 year mortgage, you may be able to refinance to a 20-year or even 10-year mortgage, for roughly the same (or even lower) monthly payment amount. More of the money, that way, will be going to pay down the principal loan.

4. Downsize after retiring. When you do leave your job, whether for permanent retirement or as a temporary leave, you may want to consider changing your residence. Many retirees choose to move to a smaller house with a lower expenses and mortgage costs. You may also wish to move to a different part of the country with lower overall costs of living.



Method 4 Making Other Miscellaneous Arrrangements.

1. Investigate your employer's maternity leave benefits. Some employers will offer paid maternity leave for some period of time. Others may stick to the allotted unpaid leave that is required under the Family and Medical Leave Act, which allows up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave. However, many small employers are even exempt from this. You need to find out what policy your employer has, and use that information to help you determine what financial help you will need.

For a maternity leave, you can also investigate whether you can be covered under short term disability insurance. This could provide a portion of your salary during your leave. To investigate coverage, you should talk with your employer or human resources personnel, or your own insurance company.

2. Plan some alternative, temporary income. If you are out of work temporarily, either looking for a new job, on a maternity leave, caring for an ill family member or for some other reason, you may want to plan for some temporary work that you can do. Find something that gives you the flexibility that you need to go along with your leave, but still provides some income for you and your family. For example.

Even with a new baby or an ill family member, you can probably find some time to tutor a few students a week or teach music lessons (if you have that talent).

You might be able to do some freelance writing or editing.

3. Transfer your company-based savings plans. If you participated in an employer-based savings or retirement plan, you should transfer that plan when you leave. Your financial adviser may be able to help you set up a personal IRA, or you might talk to an investments adviser at your bank.

4. Collect any payout benefits. If your company allowed you to accrue vacation time or sick time, you might be able to cash that in and collect an additional payment in accordance with your contract. In some cases, this can be a valuable payoff amount.

In some cases, you may be able to collect a partial cash payout for unused sick or vacation days to provide some cash for a temporary emergency leave, such as a family illness or bereavement leave. Even if such a benefit is not standard, you may want to talk with your employer and come up with some creative possibilities.

If you are not aware whether or not you have such a benefit, contact your company’s human resources department and ask.

5. Maximize stock options, if any. If you were granted the option to purchase stock in the company, and you have not exercised that option to its fullest potential, you should do so before leaving. These options can often be very valuable and will not be available to you later.

Depending on your contract, you may have a set period of time to purchase such options upon your separation from the company.

6. Plan for health insurance. One of the primary benefits of employment is having health insurance. When you plan to leave, whether for permanent retirement or a temporary leave for a job change, you will need to make plans for some replacement health insurance. You may wish to investigate the following options:

If you are under age 26, your parents may be able to add you to their health plan.

If you participated in the insurance plan through your employer, you may be eligible through COBRA to continue on that plan for up to 3 years by making your own monthly payments.

Your spouse or partner may be able to add you to their health plan.

February 25, 2020

how to find a home after divorce with limited finances

How to Find a Home After Divorce with Limited Finances.

Divorce is an emotionally draining experience, and on top of everything else you need to find somewhere to stay. There are fewer options for people with limited finances. Since you probably can’t buy a home, you should find a cheap rental in a good location. If necessary, you can crash with friends or family or even try to stay at home with your ex-spouse until you save up enough money.



Method 1 Finding a Cheap Rental.

1. Search the Internet. Looking for cheap rental options is a little like searching for a needle in a haystack. However, there are cheap apartment rentals out there. Check websites such as Rent.com. A studio or a bedroom in someone’s house will probably be the cheapest to rent.

You might need a small place at first—really small. In expensive cities, you might get a 100 square foot micro-studio for under $1,000.

Also consider apartments in slightly shady neighborhoods. Check neighborhood crime rates at www.neighborhoodscout.com. Remember that your first home after a divorce doesn’t need to be your permanent home.

2. Contact hotels. You might only need a temporary place to stay, e.g., for a month or so. In some countries, such as Canada, a lease must be for at least 12 months. Your only option for short-term housing might be to stay in a hotel or motel.

Many national chains have extended-stay hotels. Call and ask about rates.

Renting a hotel this way is more expensive than renting an apartment. However, it’s more convenient if you need short-term housing.

3. View the apartment. Call up the landlord and ask to see the place. No matter how desperate you are, you shouldn’t rent a place without first viewing it. Some cheap apartments are unsanitary and unsafe.

Make sure the apartment is close to work or accessible by public transportation.

Check your cell phone reception. You can save money if you just use your cell phone and skip the landline.

Also confirm that there is enough water pressure. Flush the toilet and turn on the taps.

4. Check your credit. More and more landlords are looking at people’s credit history before deciding to rent to them. Pull your credit score and credit history. If your score is low, try to clean up your credit history quickly.

There may be errors on your credit history that are pulling down your score. For example, your ex-spouse’s debts might show up on your credit report, or accounts might wrongly be listed as in default. Dispute any credit report errors. It usually takes a couple months for inaccurate information to come off.

5. Ask if you can forego a security deposit. Landlords typically want a month’s rent as a security deposit to protect them in case you damage the apartment or skip out before the end of the lease. If you have good credit or a long rental history, you can ask the landlord if you can rent without paying a deposit.

If necessary, check whether you can put your rent on a credit card. It’s not an ideal solution, but it will help you get a roof over your head. You can pay the credit balance down once you get re-established.

6. Get a roommate, if necessary. Any apartment is cheaper if you have someone splitting the bills. You can advertise for a roommate on websites such as Craigslist, though it is better if you know the person already. Confirm that the lease allows you to have a roommate, because not all leases do.

If you have to advertise, ask any potential roommate for references and one month’s security deposit.

Be very clear about your expectations regarding cleanliness and having guests over.



Method 2 Staying with Friends or Family.

1. Call them up and ask. Don’t show up at someone’s doorstep with a suitcase, but call ahead of time. Ask if you can stay with them for a little bit. Give them a deadline when you anticipate moving out.

For example, you can say, “Mom, I need to come home. Is that okay? I’ve only got a few hundred saved. But if I can stay with you for two or three months, I’ll be back on my feet.”

2. Save money fast. You can’t sleep on someone’s couch forever, so cut all unnecessary expenses and take on a part-time job if possible. Build up enough money to afford a security deposit on a small apartment.

A part-time job might be ideal since it will keep you out of the house. Check Craigslist for part-time gigs such as dog walker, Uber driver, or bartender.

3. Be a model guest. People are doing you a huge favor by letting you crash with them for a little while. Make things easy on your host by keeping your space clean, not making noise, and being respectful when your host has guests.

Wash dishes or prepare meals without asking. This will relieve your host’s stress.

Avoid draining your friend’s electricity by charging up your computer and phone on their dime. Instead, find a public café or recharge while at work.

Keep complaints to yourself. Do you think the sheets are scratchy? Consider yourself lucky to have a place to stay.

4. Follow house rules. Your friends might have rules that seem weird to you. That’s not the point. You need to follow them if you don’t want to get kicked out. Ask about anything that seems unclear.

Some rules are unspoken. Pay attention to your host’s habits. For example, if they only watch TV with the volume down low, do the same.

5. Buy your own food. You should prepare your own meals so that your host doesn’t feel like they have to wait on you. Ask your friend where the nearest grocery store is and load up on food. Make sure there’s enough room in the refrigerator.

6. Volunteer to cover expenses. You can build goodwill by volunteering to buy food or paying other bills. For example, pick up a large pizza on your way home from work and invite your host to share.

7. Leave when asked. Someone might need you to leave before you want to. Gather your things and thank them. Then call up other family or friends to find a place to stay.

Remember to clean up after yourself. Remove any trash and wash the sheets or vacuum the sofa you slept on. Don’t leave anything behind.



Method 3 Living With Your Ex.

1. Talk to your ex. No law says you must leave your home after a divorce. If you have no money, you might be best off sitting tight until you’ve managed to save up enough for an apartment. Of course, you’ll need your ex spouse’s permission—especially if they were given the house in the divorce decree.

If your ex doesn’t want you in the house, volunteer to stay in the garage or in a guest house.

Staying in the house isn’t an option if there’s been any history of domestic violence, or if there is a restraining order against you.

2. Contribute to the bills. You should split shared costs, such as property taxes, insurance, electricity and—if you can afford it—the mortgage. Sit down with your spouse and talk about what you will contribute.

If you don’t have any money, volunteer to do things around the house. You can cook all meals, make repairs, and clean.

3. Come up with a schedule. Try to limit contact as much as possible. Staying in the house will be uncomfortable for everybody, but a detailed routine can make things easier. If your ex thrives on conflict, then limiting contact will be beneficial.

For example, you might get up an hour earlier than your ex and come back home an hour earlier. Schedule when you’ll use the bathroom and the kitchen.

4. Be considerate. You might have been a slob while married, but now you need to clean up after yourself. Become the ideal roommate. Follow these rules.

Wash your own dishes.

Eat only the food you buy. If you want something your ex bought, ask first.

Volunteer to clean shared spaces, such as bathrooms, and mow or rake the lawn.

5. Avoid bringing dates home. Your ex might hit the roof, and who can blame them? It’s terribly rude to start dating in front of your ex-spouse. If you want to date, then meet outside the home and don’t bring them back.

There’s also no reason to advertise that you’re dating. Keep that news to yourself.

6. Reduce conflict. If you have children, they will be harmed by constant fighting. As long as you are staying in the house, you need to commit to living peacefully. You can defuse tension by practicing the following.

Listen to your ex-spouse and avoid getting defensive. If your ex complains about your habits, avoid the temptation of starting a tit-for-tat argument. After all, your ex might have a legitimate grievance.

Don’t revisit the divorce. You’re living at home for financial reasons, not because you want to pick apart why you divorced in the first place.

7. Leave as soon as possible. Staying in the house should be a temporary solution. Some people get comfortable being part of a couple even when they are no longer married. For your own personal growth, you should move out as soon as you can afford it.



Method 4 Considering Other Options.

1. Rent a motor home. If you need a temporary place to stay, rent an RV or buy a used one. Ask friends or family if you can park on their property. If you don’t know anyone, you can park at a local campground for a fee. Recreational vehicles typically have sleeping, dining, and bathroom areas.

You can find rentals online or by looking in your telephone book. Shop around for the most competitive price.

2. Apply for housing assistance. In the U.S., low-income people can apply for a Section 8 voucher. You find a landlord willing to accept the voucher and rent directly from them. The voucher then subsidizes your rent. Contact your nearest Public Housing Authority to apply.

There are income limits for eligibility. Typically, your income shouldn’t exceed 50% of the median income of a family your size in the county or city where you want to live. For example, the median income for a single person might be $25,000. Your income will need to be $12,500 or less.

Even if you qualify, there’s usually a long waiting list. You might need temporary shelter.

3. Get a room at the Y. Your local YMCA or YWCA might have rooms for rent. Generally, they will charge by the day, week, or month, and you can book online. A night at the YMCA in the Upper West Side costs around $100 a night. This is pricey, but a decent choice if you need a place to crash for a couple days.



Tips.

If you have children but are not receiving child support, contact your local child support agency immediately. They can track down missing parents, establish paternity, and get a child support order in place.

February 16, 2020

how to prevent arguments about finances

How to Prevent Arguments About Finances.

Money and finances are one of the most common sources of conflict for couples. Money problems can stem from not being open about your finances and having differing views of how money should be spent. To help prevent fights about finances, discuss each other’s views about money, come to a compromise that respects both your values, communicate about your finances openly, and set goals to help keep your finances in order.



Method 1 Discussing Your Views About Money.

1. Talk about your view on money. One of the money problems that arises between couples is due to their differing position on money. Some people are spenders and others are savers. These two mindsets can strongly clash. To help get past this problem, you should talk about these differences.

During this discussion, talk about whether you are a saver or spender.

Having open communication about your ideas and feelings on money can help you start to solve or eliminate problems.

For example, you may say, "I believe that money is hard-earned and should be enjoyed." Alternately, you may say, "Saving money is important to me. We work too hard for it to spend it often."

2. Discuss what money means to you. Often, the arguments about finances aren’t about money specifically, but about what money means to the people in the relationship. To help prevent any financial arguments, you and your partner should explain to each other what money means to you and what it signifies. This can help you understand each other.

For example, you may think that saving money means safety and security. You may think that saving money or spending it can show love and affection. Saving money may make you feel in control and like you have power.

You may feel that you deserve to spend your hard earned money on yourself, or you may feel that you deserve to save your hard earned money for future plans.

Determine if you or your partner use money as a way to measure success, status, or keep score with others.

Make sure to discuss any fears you have about money and the way that your family approached money growing up.

For example, you may say, "Saving money makes me feel safe. When we were growing up, we had no money, so having a savings account helps me feel like I'm taking care of my family."

3. Acknowledge your differences about money with an open mind. After you have discussed what money means to both of you, you should use the opportunity to understand each other’s position and ideas about money. You should not point fingers or try to make one of your right and wrong. There is nothing wrong with having different values about money. You have to work towards understanding, accepting, and compromising.

For example, work on understanding why your partner feels that spending money is something they have earned and deserved. Try to see how saving money makes your partner feel in control and safe.

Both you and your partner are two different people, which means you are not going to have the same opinions about everything. Communicating about your ideas of money can help prevent and avoid misunderstandings.

If your partner has illogical, irresponsible, or contradictory ideas about money, that is a separate issue. You want to accept different ideas about money, yet help your partner work through illogical money ideas that may harm your family.

Try saying, "I understand that you want to save money though I like to treat myself for my hard work. Can you explain to me why saving money is so important to you? I will explain to you why I think we deserve to spend some of our money."

4. Compromise with both of your sets of values. After you have figured out what each of you feels about money, you can then work on a compromise. Compromise means you both stay positive as you find a way to negotiate both of your values. Find some common ground that benefits you both. You should work on finding ways for both of your to compromise equally so one person isn’t giving up more than the other.

For example, you may come to a compromise where you set aside money each month to spend on yourself while your partner sets aside a similar amount to save. You both can come to an agreement on what things are considered special splurge purchases, and decide what you want to save money on to purchase or invest in in the future.

5. Take a break and come back to the discussion. If you and your partner are discussing money and start arguing or yelling, stop the conversation and go do something else. Stepping away for a moment will help you and your spouse have time to calm down and think more logically about what has been said.

You and your partner will not always agree about money. However, it is crucial that you learn how to compromise so you can meet everyone’s needs and address each other’s concerns.



Method 2 Communicating Effectively About Finances,

1. Be open about your finances. One way to help prevent arguments about money is the be open about your finances with your partner. This helps each of you be on the same page, so you won’t be keeping secrets about money or lying about money. These behaviors can cause problems and arguments.

When your relationship gets to the point where you start sharing bills and financial responsibilities, you should be open about all of your finances. This includes your debt, income, and financial obligations.

Tell your partner, "I want to share my finances with you. I have some student loan debt, a car payment, and two credit cards."

2. Keep your partner in the loop. You should share vital financial information with your partner so that you both stay informed of each other’s financial situation. This includes any changes to your income, tax returns, and credit reports. This helps maintain honesty and communication between you, and you can avoid potential problems if you keep something from your partner.

This often happens at the beginning of a partnership, when you let your partner know your financial situation. However, you should continue doing this throughout the relationship, especially if things change significantly.

For example, you may say, "My credit report has changed recently due to my recent bill payments. I'd like to go over what changed the credit report with you."

Another way to prevent arguments is to agree to text or call if you are thinking of purchasing something over an agreed upon spending limit, such as $100. If you or your partner is out shopping and finds something above the agreed upon limit, then sending a quick text or making a quick phone call may prevent an argument later on.

3. Establish weekly money talks. Another way to help prevent fights about money is to discuss any minor problems before they can turn into something worse. Getting together with your partner once every week or two to discuss the budget and any minor problems can help keep the lines of communication open and help prevent fights.

For example, you may get together and discuss how one of you spent more on groceries than was budgeted, or another minor financial problem. Addressing the problems early can help prevent the small things from turning into major problems.

You may say things like, "We went over the budget on groceries, but by cutting a few corners, we can adhere to it next month."

4. Talk about how you will approach helping out family. Many people help out family members financially. However, this can cause a lot of problems and arguments. To help prevent this, talk about what you and your partner want to do about helping out family members so you have a procedure in place.

For example, you may decide to help out a family member up to a certain dollar amount or a certain number of times each year. You may decide that you want to help out certain family members but not others. Discuss these issues with your partner and come up with a solution that you both can handle.

You may say, "I understand that your parents struggle, but we can only afford to help them for this set amount of money three times each year."



Method 3 Setting Financial Goals.

1. Create a budget. Budgets can help prevent a lot of arguments about money. Budgets create a solid plan for your money so there won’t be any questions or confusion about where the money goes and when. Budgets give you and your partner a guide to help stay on track where money is concerned.

If one partner has trouble adhering to the budget, you can look at the numbers and find areas that need improvement or adjustment.

Make sure to budget in money for extra purchases, such as an impulse buy or going out to dinner.

Include each of your money interests in the budget. If you like to spend money but your partner likes to save, budget those things in each month.

If budget has a negative connotation, consider calling it a “spending plan” instead of budget.

2. Share financial tasks. To help keep the financial responsibilities even and a joint effort, come up with a way share tasks and assign a duty to each person. This helps take all the pressure off one person and lets you work together to manage your finances.

For example, you may pay the bills while your partner makes and maintains the budget. You may focus on the savings account while your partner invests money.

3. Come up with long term goals. Figure out what your long term goals are for your money. Do you want to invest? Are you saving for a new car or house? Are there kids in the future? Do you want to take vacations? Each of these future plans are important. You should discuss what you and your partner want in the future and come up with a way to approach it.

Most of these purchases require pre-planning and saving. Prioritize what you want to save your money for.

4. Approach finances as a team. To help keep your finances running smoothly and eliminate any potential conflicts, work on your finances as a team. Even though one person may be in charge of the budget or paying the bills, you should talk about these ideas and sit down once a month to discuss the month’s finances.

You may decide to pay bills together and do the budget together instead of assigning the task. You may also switch back and forth and do a different financial task each month.

5. Consider having separate accounts. If finances and spending habits are a frequent source of frustration in your relationship, then you and your partner might consider setting up separate bank accounts and just maintain a joint account for your shared bills and savings. This may help to prevent arguments about finances if you each have a set amount of money to spend on whatever you want each month.

6. Seek professional help. If you and your partner fight too often about finances, you can seek professional help. You may want to visit a therapist who specializes in resolving conflicts in relationships. This can help you get past any barriers and help you learn how to compromise.

You may also want to visit a financial planner. Financial planners can help you figure out how to budget and compromise on financial issues.

February 11, 2020

how to help elderly parents with finances

How to Help Elderly Parents With Finances.

Helping your elderly parents with finances can be a tricky thing to do. It can be frustrating for you and can cause hurt or embarrassment for your parents. If you go about it with discretion and respect, though, you can streamline your parents’ finances and remove a lot of stress from your and their lives. By communicating properly, budgeting, and simplifying their affairs, you’ll be able to help your elderly parents with their finances. In the end, you and your parents might be come closer, and you'll both have a lot less to worry about.



Method 1 Budgeting.

1. Find out their sources of income. Sit down with your parents and ask them to list their sources of income. If they are unable to list their income, keep an eye on their mailbox and wait for checks to arrive. In addition, contact their bank to find out if they have recurring direct deposits into their accounts. Some sources of income might include.

Social security.

Pensions.

Retirement accounts that include stocks, CDs, and bonds.

Real estate holdings.

2. List their expenses. After you’ve determined your parents’ income, you’ll need to list their expenses. You can also do this by sitting down with them and asking them to list expenses. However, if they can’t remember, you’ll have to wait on bills to arrive in the mail or for businesses to call them asking for payment. Some common expenses include.

Phone.

Cable and internet.

Utilities like electricity, gas, and water.

3. Meet with professionals who manage their affairs. In addition to getting records from your parents and tracking them down yourself, you should also meet with any professionals who manage aspects of your parents’ affairs. This includes lawyers, accountants, management companies, insurance agents and brokers. They will likely have valuable information about your parents' finances you need.

Don't be intimidated by professionals you may have to meet with. In most cases, they'll be happy to help you and your parents.

4. Cut expenses, if needed. Once you’ve gathered a list of their income and expenses, you’ll have a very good idea of what they can afford and what they can’t afford. When you have this information, start trimming expenses. This way, your parents’ income and savings will last them a lot longer than it would otherwise. Some things to cut include:

Cable.

Very large life insurance policies.

Magazine and newspaper subscriptions.

Charitable donations.

Cars or homes that have been financed.

5. Raise money for your parents, if they need it. In the case that your parents don’t have the income to meet their expenses, you’ll have to raise money to help them. There are a variety of things you can do without reaching into your own savings account. Consider:

Selling their home or getting them a reverse mortgage. A reverse mortgage is a loan that the borrower does not need to pay back until they sell the home.

Auctioning cars and other valuable possessions. Your parents might have valuable artwork, a car collection, or a piece of land somewhere that could be sold. That money may be just enough to meet their expenses.

Avoid taking loans or selling your parents' property before talking to them about it.

6. Find out if there are entitlements they are eligible for. In addition to identifying their current sources of income, you may be able to find entitlements or other sources of income for your elderly parents. To do this, check with your local, state/regional, or national governments. Don't worry, though, there are many resources available that will make this search easy.

For people in the United States, visit http://www.benefitscheckup.org to identify new sources of financial help for your parents.



Method 2 Organizing Their Affairs.

1. Get a power of attorney. A power of attorney will give you the legal right to act on your parents’ behalf in managing financial (and legal) aspects of their life. As a result, you’ll have the right to talk to your parents’ insurance companies, bank, pension administrators, and more. Without a power of attorney, you’ll have serious problems managing your parents’ finances.

2. Reduce the number of credit cards and checking accounts they have. Shut down all checking accounts and close all credit cards except for one or two. It will be very difficult for you to monitor their finances if they have many cards and accounts. Ultimately, it’ll be easier for you to follow one card and one checking account.

Verify that accounts and cards you intend to close do not have automatic payments or direct deposits attached to them.

3. Set up automated payments. Contact all the businesses that your parents have regular or recurring payments with. Provide them with a credit card number or a bank account number from which they can draft money that they are owed.

You may be able to do this through the business’s website.

4. Hire someone to manage their finances. If your parents’ finances are too complicated or their estate is too large for you to manage on your own, you may need to hire a third party to help you. In this event, a financial advisor, management company, or a law firm may be able to help you help your parents.

Determine if you or your parents have enough money/income to employ a professional financial manager.

5. Get their tax information. Ask your parents for their prior income tax returns. If they can’t find them, ask their accountant. With their tax information, you’ll be able to file the current year’s taxes, consolidate loans, and much more.

If you are unable to get tax information from your parents or their accountant, visit https://www.irs.gov/individuals/get-transcript to get transcripts of prior years taxes. Remember, though, you’ll need to have a power of attorney to do so.

6. Have them write or update their will. One aspect of your parents’ finances that they might neglect is their will. Their will is important as it will allow their estate to be settled relatively easily if they pass away. While this will probably be a tough conversation for both of you, you should ask them to write a will.

7. Document everything you do. Keep good records of everything you do for your parents. This includes keeping copies of checks you write, holding onto receipts for things you pay for, and taking notes of complicated financial issues. If you don’t document things well, you could find yourself in a legal battle with a sibling later on.



Method 3 Communicating Properly.

1. Ask if they want help. Before you take matters into your own hands and try to take control of your parents’ finances, you should ask them if they want help. Depending on their personality and position, they may respond negatively or affirmatively. Whatever their response, you'll at least open up communication and let your parents know that you are thinking of them.

If your parents are terminally ill or intellectually diminished, you may not need to ask them. Instead, talk to them and let them know you are going to try to organize their affairs.

2. Respect their wishes. Depending on your parents’ circumstances, you should respect their wishes as best as you can. If you disregard their wishes, you’ll probably alienate them and poison your relationship. By respecting their wishes, you’ll turn managing their finances into a positive experience.

3. Keep them involved. While you may be tempted to just take care of everything yourself, make sure that you keep your parents part of the discussion for a long as you can. This is important, as you don’t want them to ever be surprised about where they stand financially. In addition, if they stay active, they might fare better in terms of their health.

Schedule monthly meetings with your parents to talk about their finances. At the very least, take some time to let them know where they stand.



Tips.

Keep an eye out for signs of dementia; this is a signal to start taking great control of your parents' assets.

If you are working with your parents' finances, be sure and keep siblings informed in writing. This will help alleviate any tension about financial matters when your parents pass away, as that sibling or those siblings will be aware of what the state of your parents' finances are.

Warnings.

Educate your parents about scams. Request that they not mail any large payments to anyone for any reason without discussing it with you first.

February 11, 2020

how to prepare your finances for a job leave

How to Prepare Your Finances for a Job Leave.

Working people depend on having an income to live. You need to pay for housing, food, health care and many other things. Nevertheless, there may come a time when you want to be able to leave your job. The most common reasons are either retirement or a temporary leave to change jobs or careers. Whatever your reason for wanting to leave work, you will need to make financial plans. You will need to set aside some savings and make changes to your spending. Your mortgage and insurance costs will be an important part of the picture as well. With adequate planning, you can make it happen.



Method 1 Setting a Target.

1. Choose a date. Some people may decide at the start of their career that they want to work to age 50, or 55, or some other number. If you would like to make this a goal, you need to set your target and then work toward it. Claiming to have a goal means nothing unless you take steps to get there, but your first step is to decide what you want.

2. Identify an event. Your target to leave your present job may be some event, such as reaching a particular level of expertise or the day your supervisor leaves. Some of these targeting events may be under your control, and some may not. The less certain the event, the more prepared you will need to be.

For example, you may have decided that you want to leave your present company if they ever sell out or merge with some other company. Since you cannot control something like this and may not know when it is coming, you should try to have some alternative source of employment at least in mind for when the time comes.

In the event of a maternity leave, you may not know for years exactly when it is coming, but then in the final nine months (or so) you will know almost exactly. You can plan in general to have some savings set aside, and then when you get pregnant you can begin making some specific last-minute preparations.

Sometimes, the "event" that triggers a temporary leave might be a long-term illness, either yours or someone you need to care for. This can come with almost no advance warning. You need to plan for the general contingency and make some emergency preparations.

3. Plan a savings target. This is probably the most controllable concept. You can sit down with a financial planner and decide how much money you would need to have in savings to allow yourself and your family to survive adequately without your income. Then work toward setting aside that amount of money. As time goes by and interest rates fluctuate, you may need to adjust your plans accordingly. However, setting the target and doing the work up front will help you be as prepared as you can be.

If your target is to retire early, financial experts recommend that your savings target should be about 25 times your annual salary. You will then be able to withdraw money at the rate of about 4% per year.

If you target is to be able to leave work temporarily to look for a new job or another reason, then your target will be whatever amount you need to meet your expenses for that time. For example, the average job search is approximately four to six months, so you should plan to have savings to cover your living costs for that long.



Method 2 Reaching Your Target.

1. Work with a financial adviser. If you want to plan for leaving your job, you should enlist the help of a qualified financial adviser. Someone with expertise in investing can help you decide how much you need to save and can help you find the best ways to invest. If you want some help with finding a qualified financial adviser, read Hire a Financial Advisor or Select a Financial Advisor.

2. Invest your savings carefully. Working with your financial adviser, you will want to do more than just place your earnings in a bank account. Simple savings accounts earn very low interest. You will do better to invest in bonds, stocks or other securities, in accordance with your adviser’s opinions.

Investing works best when you begin as early as possible. Your best ally when saving is time. Your interest compounds more effectively when you begin early.

If your focus is to be able to take a temporary leave at some time, then you may need to have your savings in a readily accessible account. Long-term IRA savings are good for retirement planning, but you may need to be able to withdraw money sooner. Work with your adviser to find the best investment or savings plans for your needs.

If you want to plan for a lengthy, temporary leave, such as for a maternity or family illness, you will want to have savings in some readily accessible account. A short-term bond or money market may be the best bet, or even a simple savings account that you earmark for such an emergency.

3. Cut your expenses as much as possible. Many people live their lives from month to month and use a great deal of their income. If you manage a budget this way, you will do fine from month to month, but you will greatly delay your savings plan. If your goal is to be able to leave work, you should begin by cutting expenses as much as possible.

To begin cutting expenses, start by listing them all. Then review how you spend your money over a one- to three-month period and identify the expenses that you believe you can live without. Perhaps you can reduce the number of times that you go out to dinner. Maybe you can cut some entertainment expenses.

Manage your utilities. Try to reduce some of your monthly expenses by reducing utility usage in your home. Manage the heat, turn off lights, and do what you can to save water. These sound like small steps, but over time they can all add up.

Cutting expenses is a powerful financial tool for any job leave, whether permanent/retirement or a temporary leave for illness, maternity or some other reason. You need to consider the absence from work as an overall change in your lifestyle.

4. Plan to spend some on your new job search. Part of setting your target, if you are anticipating leaving your current job, should be to have some savings available to spend on a search for a new one. You will need money for correspondence, printing resumes, travel, parking, and possibly one or two new interview suits. You should anticipate these costs, estimate the amount of money that you will need, and set this aside as part of your target savings.



Method 3 Handling Your Mortgage.

1. Recognize the importance of your mortgage. For most people, housing payments make up the largest expenses they have. If you are paying rent, rather than owning your residence, those monthly payments are effectively doing nothing for you. If possible, purchase a property and get a mortgage. In this way, your monthly payments will be building equity for you. At the end of your mortgage, you will own the property outright in your own name.

2. Aim for your target date. As much as possible, try to align your mortgage to your target retirement date. That is, if you are relatively young and just starting out, then you may want to get a 30 year mortgage to last the duration of your career. However, if you can afford the monthly payments of a shorter mortgage, you will be setting aside money toward your equity at a faster rate.

3. Refinance when possible. When mortgage interest rates go down, you should try to refinance. By refinancing, you will get a lower interest rate and reduce your monthly payments. You may also take that opportunity to refinance into a shorter term. For example, if you started out with a 30 year mortgage, you may be able to refinance to a 20-year or even 10-year mortgage, for roughly the same (or even lower) monthly payment amount. More of the money, that way, will be going to pay down the principal loan.

4. Downsize after retiring. When you do leave your job, whether for permanent retirement or as a temporary leave, you may want to consider changing your residence. Many retirees choose to move to a smaller house with a lower expenses and mortgage costs. You may also wish to move to a different part of the country with lower overall costs of living.



Method 4 Making Other Miscellaneous Arrrangements.

1. Investigate your employer's maternity leave benefits. Some employers will offer paid maternity leave for some period of time. Others may stick to the allotted unpaid leave that is required under the Family and Medical Leave Act, which allows up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave. However, many small employers are even exempt from this. You need to find out what policy your employer has, and use that information to help you determine what financial help you will need.

For a maternity leave, you can also investigate whether you can be covered under short term disability insurance. This could provide a portion of your salary during your leave. To investigate coverage, you should talk with your employer or human resources personnel, or your own insurance company.

2. Plan some alternative, temporary income. If you are out of work temporarily, either looking for a new job, on a maternity leave, caring for an ill family member or for some other reason, you may want to plan for some temporary work that you can do. Find something that gives you the flexibility that you need to go along with your leave, but still provides some income for you and your family. For example.

Even with a new baby or an ill family member, you can probably find some time to tutor a few students a week or teach music lessons (if you have that talent).

You might be able to do some freelance writing or editing.

3. Transfer your company-based savings plans. If you participated in an employer-based savings or retirement plan, you should transfer that plan when you leave. Your financial adviser may be able to help you set up a personal IRA, or you might talk to an investments adviser at your bank.

4. Collect any payout benefits. If your company allowed you to accrue vacation time or sick time, you might be able to cash that in and collect an additional payment in accordance with your contract. In some cases, this can be a valuable payoff amount.

In some cases, you may be able to collect a partial cash payout for unused sick or vacation days to provide some cash for a temporary emergency leave, such as a family illness or bereavement leave. Even if such a benefit is not standard, you may want to talk with your employer and come up with some creative possibilities.

If you are not aware whether or not you have such a benefit, contact your company’s human resources department and ask.

5. Maximize stock options, if any. If you were granted the option to purchase stock in the company, and you have not exercised that option to its fullest potential, you should do so before leaving. These options can often be very valuable and will not be available to you later.

Depending on your contract, you may have a set period of time to purchase such options upon your separation from the company.

6. Plan for health insurance. One of the primary benefits of employment is having health insurance. When you plan to leave, whether for permanent retirement or a temporary leave for a job change, you will need to make plans for some replacement health insurance. You may wish to investigate the following options:

If you are under age 26, your parents may be able to add you to their health plan.

If you participated in the insurance plan through your employer, you may be eligible through COBRA to continue on that plan for up to 3 years by making your own monthly payments.

Your spouse or partner may be able to add you to their health plan.

February 11, 2020